Alex Elle

Oh my gosh, I don't know what it's about, but all of us go through it. I know that when I met my husband, he comes from a big family and they are like really lovey-dovey, super supportive, like very different from how I was raised. And I remember being like, I don't want to be a part of this family. Too much love happening over here. It felt so foreign to me that I was willing to leave.

And I told him, I don't want a family with you. This was before we were married. And I was looking for a way out because I was like, this is too good. His mom loves me. His family loves me. They're kind to me. I'm not worthy of this joy. And Ryan said to me, all I want to do is love you. Why won't you let me love you?

And I told him, I don't want a family with you. This was before we were married. And I was looking for a way out because I was like, this is too good. His mom loves me. His family loves me. They're kind to me. I'm not worthy of this joy. And Ryan said to me, all I want to do is love you. Why won't you let me love you?

And I told him, I don't want a family with you. This was before we were married. And I was looking for a way out because I was like, this is too good. His mom loves me. His family loves me. They're kind to me. I'm not worthy of this joy. And Ryan said to me, all I want to do is love you. Why won't you let me love you?

And that question for me was really, really hard to reckon with because love for me meant conditional. Love for me meant I love you when you are pleasing me and when you are shutting up and sitting down and when you are doing what I say. And if you aren't, I'm taking my love away from you. So love for me always felt like this carrot dangling. And so I never thought I was really worthy of

And that question for me was really, really hard to reckon with because love for me meant conditional. Love for me meant I love you when you are pleasing me and when you are shutting up and sitting down and when you are doing what I say. And if you aren't, I'm taking my love away from you. So love for me always felt like this carrot dangling. And so I never thought I was really worthy of

And that question for me was really, really hard to reckon with because love for me meant conditional. Love for me meant I love you when you are pleasing me and when you are shutting up and sitting down and when you are doing what I say. And if you aren't, I'm taking my love away from you. So love for me always felt like this carrot dangling. And so I never thought I was really worthy of

of the love and the joy and the ease, the easefulness that I was receiving. I was so used to chaos and dysfunction that it felt really foreign to have peace in my life. Suspicious even. Like, oh, what you up to? Like literally suspicion, suspicion. And here's something that I've grown into. One, I tell my students and my clients often, give yourself permission to be in the middle of your healing.

of the love and the joy and the ease, the easefulness that I was receiving. I was so used to chaos and dysfunction that it felt really foreign to have peace in my life. Suspicious even. Like, oh, what you up to? Like literally suspicion, suspicion. And here's something that I've grown into. One, I tell my students and my clients often, give yourself permission to be in the middle of your healing.

of the love and the joy and the ease, the easefulness that I was receiving. I was so used to chaos and dysfunction that it felt really foreign to have peace in my life. Suspicious even. Like, oh, what you up to? Like literally suspicion, suspicion. And here's something that I've grown into. One, I tell my students and my clients often, give yourself permission to be in the middle of your healing.

You don't have to be at the ground up. You don't have to be sky high, you know, thinking that, oh my gosh, I've arrived. First of all, there's no arrival in healing. We're going to be healing to the day we die.

You don't have to be at the ground up. You don't have to be sky high, you know, thinking that, oh my gosh, I've arrived. First of all, there's no arrival in healing. We're going to be healing to the day we die.

You don't have to be at the ground up. You don't have to be sky high, you know, thinking that, oh my gosh, I've arrived. First of all, there's no arrival in healing. We're going to be healing to the day we die.

I'm just telling y'all now. I know some of y'all might not like to hear that, but Thich Nhat Hanh taught me that there is healing always. Okay. Being in the middle, easefulness is in the middle. Sweetness, tenderness. Patience is in the middle.

I'm just telling y'all now. I know some of y'all might not like to hear that, but Thich Nhat Hanh taught me that there is healing always. Okay. Being in the middle, easefulness is in the middle. Sweetness, tenderness. Patience is in the middle.

I'm just telling y'all now. I know some of y'all might not like to hear that, but Thich Nhat Hanh taught me that there is healing always. Okay. Being in the middle, easefulness is in the middle. Sweetness, tenderness. Patience is in the middle.

And so when I started looking at my healing and the love and joy and all those good feelings that were happening as ease and being in the middle, it felt more comforting. It felt more accessible. It didn't feel like someone was just going to snatch it from me.

And so when I started looking at my healing and the love and joy and all those good feelings that were happening as ease and being in the middle, it felt more comforting. It felt more accessible. It didn't feel like someone was just going to snatch it from me.

And so when I started looking at my healing and the love and joy and all those good feelings that were happening as ease and being in the middle, it felt more comforting. It felt more accessible. It didn't feel like someone was just going to snatch it from me.

I feel that 100%. And when you were speaking, what was coming up for me was it's this constant unlearning to relearn. It's a cycle. It's a cycle. Because there's always going to be things that scare us in life. There's always going to be things that trigger us and make us go back to our old self. It's like, how do we redirect? How do we unlearn that Okay, I was not safe then, but I am safe now.