Alfie

She'd say, like, Christ, Alfie, you're picking up your antidepressants, not doing an improv bit, and I'd be like, why not both? Ah. Well, poor Darla the pharmacist won't have to deal with my terrible customer service stand-up routines anymore, so there is good to come out of this situation after all. I think I got this dictaphone to do poetry.

God, I will spare you my slam poetry phase, nobody needs that in their life. God, none of this is important, and I need to get this out, I need to. There are only snatches now where I'm awake enough to speak, and I think it's only going to get worse, so... And in approximately four days, when my supply of this blood runs out, I'm going to either die or become something else.

God, I will spare you my slam poetry phase, nobody needs that in their life. God, none of this is important, and I need to get this out, I need to. There are only snatches now where I'm awake enough to speak, and I think it's only going to get worse, so... And in approximately four days, when my supply of this blood runs out, I'm going to either die or become something else.

I'm getting ahead of myself. I need to start at the beginning so you understand what happened. And the beginning, for me, was the people with the torn out throats. The first one I saw was the girl on the gurney.

I'm getting ahead of myself. I need to start at the beginning so you understand what happened. And the beginning, for me, was the people with the torn out throats. The first one I saw was the girl on the gurney.

The Girl on the Gurney came in at half ten on a Saturday night. Saturday night's a bad time to get hurt because everyone's getting hurt on a Saturday night. That night there was this guy down the hall with a rake in his foot. A woman who had cracked her head open on the curb. Two lads getting their lips stitched in triage.

The Girl on the Gurney came in at half ten on a Saturday night. Saturday night's a bad time to get hurt because everyone's getting hurt on a Saturday night. That night there was this guy down the hall with a rake in his foot. A woman who had cracked her head open on the curb. Two lads getting their lips stitched in triage.

Of the too few people who were actually working that night, only three of us knew the hospital well. Me, Tracy and Hayley, the junior doctor. When the girl on the gurney came in, I was on hour 16 of a 12-hour shift with lead bones and eyes so wide I was beginning to wonder if I'd ever be able to get them to shut again. I barely thought anything of it.

Of the too few people who were actually working that night, only three of us knew the hospital well. Me, Tracy and Hayley, the junior doctor. When the girl on the gurney came in, I was on hour 16 of a 12-hour shift with lead bones and eyes so wide I was beginning to wonder if I'd ever be able to get them to shut again. I barely thought anything of it.

The ragged gash on her neck was unusual, but not surprising. I didn't have the energy for surprise. When we transferred her over from the ambulance gurney onto another, she was cold to the touch, limbs loose, head lolling over the wad of gauze taped to her neck.

The ragged gash on her neck was unusual, but not surprising. I didn't have the energy for surprise. When we transferred her over from the ambulance gurney onto another, she was cold to the touch, limbs loose, head lolling over the wad of gauze taped to her neck.

Terry, the ambulance guy I've known for years, told me they thought it was a mugging, that she'd been drinking out with her friends and got separated from them, and when they found her, her throat was torn out and she was barely conscious. I don't remember what I said in response. It's not my job to care, and not about that.

Terry, the ambulance guy I've known for years, told me they thought it was a mugging, that she'd been drinking out with her friends and got separated from them, and when they found her, her throat was torn out and she was barely conscious. I don't remember what I said in response. It's not my job to care, and not about that.

The girl's eyes were half open, her hands were clammy, loosely clutched over her chest, sat in dress torn to allow for heart monitors. Her blood pressure was through the floor. Her oxygen levels were no better. Beneath the pad of gauze, her wound was jagged and strange, but despite its depth, it was no longer bleeding. The ragged flesh looked grey and almost dry.

The girl's eyes were half open, her hands were clammy, loosely clutched over her chest, sat in dress torn to allow for heart monitors. Her blood pressure was through the floor. Her oxygen levels were no better. Beneath the pad of gauze, her wound was jagged and strange, but despite its depth, it was no longer bleeding. The ragged flesh looked grey and almost dry.

I didn't have time to think beyond assessing that this wouldn't be the thing that killed her right away. With trauma, it's about priorities, and right then what we needed to do was whatever we could to get as much fluid into her system as possible. She came in pre-hooked up to IV fluids. Ambulance Terry's work was nimble and efficient as always. The girl's breath was becoming heavy and slow.

I didn't have time to think beyond assessing that this wouldn't be the thing that killed her right away. With trauma, it's about priorities, and right then what we needed to do was whatever we could to get as much fluid into her system as possible. She came in pre-hooked up to IV fluids. Ambulance Terry's work was nimble and efficient as always. The girl's breath was becoming heavy and slow.

That's normal when your blood pressure is low, but it's not a good sign. When you first start losing blood, your heart beats faster and your breath speeds up. There's less blood in the system, so your body is working extra hard to make sure that what is left is being used as best it can be. When things start to slow down like that, it means your body's running out of steam.

That's normal when your blood pressure is low, but it's not a good sign. When you first start losing blood, your heart beats faster and your breath speeds up. There's less blood in the system, so your body is working extra hard to make sure that what is left is being used as best it can be. When things start to slow down like that, it means your body's running out of steam.

It was very clear the girl on the gurney was almost entirely steamless by that point. She was in shock. What I remember really distinctly was she looked at me with those half-shut eyes and she tried to say something, but I don't know what it was. I couldn't hear her, so I just smiled and said something generic, like, we're going to look after you, like I would to anyone.