Amber

have a safe space um he's rallied like the dad like the the husbands like you would think that i did whatever i did to all of them as well and it's just very you're just like what a dirty whore or something in their mind basically like it's so stupid and they don't talk to me and these are people that were like very close to me and they won't speak i mean it's almost laughable like that part of it is like so stupid but there are days of course where i'm just like

like, do I just go back and like, it all falls back together.

And it's like, I just deal with it and figure it out.

And then I think about it and I'm like, I, I don't think that I could ever just go back and do that.

But you know, I don't know.

I mean, I love my husband.

I will love him forever.

But am I in love with my husband?

I don't know.

I always said to him, too, the moment I become indifferent about you and what you're doing, I'm out.

I don't know that I come back from that.

And I gave him so many options and opportunities to pull himself out that I don't know that there's a world where he wants to.

He wants to.

He's like, I...

I'm going to make you fall back in love with me.

And I don't really know like how much weight do I give?

Like, you know, I was alone in my marriage for so long for, and like, do I just say like, we're just supposed to be

parents and like maybe that's like our relationship and i can love you it doesn't mean you're my person you know what i mean it doesn't mean like i have to be with you but some days that feels like it would just be easier it would just shut everyone up and on other days it would be sacrificing myself that's tough what do you believe what do you believe like i guess what do you believe in in terms of what he's saying because you're right like again so it's like you know my wife and i were talking about this yesterday on the show for a completely different

Yeah.

And that's my biggest problem is, and he'll always say, there's not one person that wouldn't think that we were in love a year ago.