Amit Kumar

Participants, again, sort of gave a cupcake away to somebody else as an act of kindness.

But in another case, we had sort of what you might think of as a control condition in which no act of kindness was performed, but people still received a cupcake.

So in this other case, recipients are simply getting a cupcake for participating in the experiment rather than from another person.

as a random act of kindness.

So one of these cases includes the warmth associated with a kind exchange.

The other also has somebody receiving a cupcake but without getting it from somebody else.

And so what we do, again, is we compare expected versus actual experiences in these two cases.

And what we found was that people, again, underestimated how positive recipients would feel after this

act of kindness when they had given the cupcake to somebody else.

What we're kind of missing out on is this understanding of the additional warmth that comes from being on the receiving end of one of these acts.

We get that people like cupcakes, but it turns out that getting a cupcake as a result of an act of kindness can be surprisingly good.

Yeah, what they found was that these sort of daily acts of kindness, these expressions of appreciation, even simple compliments, those are the types of things that people say make them feel most loved by those that are closest to them in their lives.

I think what's interesting about that research, though, is that it focuses on the recipient's perspective.

So if you're asking people about what

really matters to them, what makes them feel positive in these ways, they'll tell you that it's these expressions of warmth that happen on a day-to-day basis and the types of interactions we could have all the time.

And yet, I think if you were to ask the people that

love those participants, the potential compliment givers or gratitude expressors or performers of acts of kindness, they might think that they're doing something relatively inconsequential as opposed to one of the most important things that they could do for another person.

I think the paradox is really that these are actions that tend to feel good for both the people doing them and the people on the receiving end.

And yet, even though it feels good, it's seen as good, it's perceived to be good, we are reluctant to behave in these ways that in everyday life will leave us feeling happier.

So there's a beautiful scene in this conservatory, essentially, with these lush plants, this lush foliage around.