Andrew Harrison

My rose has left me.

She's gone to Kenya with a bloke from Allied Carpets.

We had a pull-out section in the middle of... They were posters, but we pretended they were art photos to make it feel a bit more... It was called Images, referred to in the office as Images, because it made it sound classier.

But it's basically, Emma, they seem to smash its poster.

Instead of just putting the Wonderstuff and Jesus Jones and Hole and the Breeders, we would spice it up by putting in people like Brian Clough.

Or we'd put in William Shatner when you could see his toupee very clearly.

And the center spread poster, the double page foldout, which was the prime location where you were supposed to put the biggest band of the time.

We put Mulligan and O'Hare from Vic Reeves as a poster.

And the readers loved it.

And the publisher was like, what the hell are you doing?

This is stupid.

Like, no, the readers want this.

You are more excited by Mulligan and O'Hare than you are by name-identicate Britpop band who aren't quite as good as Pulp, right?

And I remember going to Glastonbury once and seeing, in order that people could find their car, they would put things on sticks or put things in the window.

Somebody had put our Brian Clough poster in the window of their car.

Achievement unlocked.

We have achieved what we needed.

Go on then.

Yes.

Well, I can tell this, Miranda, this is where I invented Glastonbury.