Andrew Huberman

Again, that's J-O-O-V-V dot com slash Huberman.

The moment you said that we're seeing a reduction in distress tolerance, I heard in my head voices on the Internet saying,

saying, oh, so we're just supposed to push our feelings aside?

Like we're just supposed to accept everything that happens to us?

We're supposed to, you know, and of course,

I don't actually believe that, but I can empathize a bit with that notion.

These things are always on a continuum.

It's a push-pull.

I was going to raise the same thing around the standards that were set for you.

Some people who grew up with very high standards set for them by parents, teachers, or coaches might internalize that as, oh,

That must mean I'm very capable.

In fact, in one of my favorite books, The Last Lecture by Randy Posh, he talks about, he was a computer scientist at Carnegie Mellon.

He eventually died.

He gave this last lecture, which is an incredible lecture.

And he said, the moment that your parents, coaches, and teachers stop pushing you is the moment you should worry because they've given up on you.

If you're pushed, people believe in you, that there's a chance you might actually accomplish something.

They believe in you.

But you could also internalize it as overwhelm.

And so I think this notion of distress tolerance, like what are the standards?

What are the standards for distress tolerance, for performance, for being a quote-unquote functional member of society while also quote-unquote honoring one's feelings, about feeling one's feelings?