Andy Zaltzman

The digital ID, they're bringing in plans to introduce compulsory digital ID, which will have access to the inner recesses of all of our British souls and send us real-time percentage Britishness readings to our mobile phones so we can keep up on exactly how

British we are at all times.

And they've also reached a compromise under which digital ID will be compulsory, but only for people planning to commit benefit fraud or other crimes.

Education for all, Bill?

That sounds like a fucking bad idea.

Frankly, we need education for none.

Education only upsets people.

And the NHS modernisation bill, which will streamline medical data with the introduction of a single patient record, who the single patient will be, is to be decided via a TV reality show with the illest people in the country pitching to a panel of celebrity medical judges.

We'll have full updates on how all those bills do on their process through whatever's left of Parliament over the next 10 years on the Bugle.

Donald Trump meets someone he's obviously scared of news now.

And Josh, exciting times in America.

Donald Trump has been to China for a meeting with President cricket team of, sorry, President 11.

Sorry, President Xi got there eventually.

It was, I mean, it was a tough one.

I found watching Trump and Xi made me think if I was a fly on a wall,

at that meeting, whose sandwich would I vomit on first?

It was a tough call.

How did Trump's visit go down in America?

There was an element of awkwardness about it, I thought.

Well, yeah.