Angie

made me believe that I had to be desirable to the opposite sex in order for me to feel worthy, right?

And I've discovered that through therapy and counseling over the years.

But if...

You didn't want to fuck me.

I didn't feel hot, right?

I didn't feel worthy.

Can I curse?

I'm sorry.

If you didn't want to, you know, sleep with me, I didn't feel like I was good enough, you know?

So that also branches off into separate things like self-image, issues, self-worth, you know?

You know, it can even develop eating disorders or anything like that.

I developed a lot of anxiety.

So yeah, definitely my childhood, you know, shaped the relationships that I got into.

What was your first serious relationship like?

Um, I was in high school and I was with him for like, I think two, three years.

I lost my virginity to him and, um, he was a little older and I was in high school still.

So I was sneaking out of my house to go, uh, you know, spend time with him and go drink and smoke and do things that we were doing.

And, um,

You know, I started going towards like the older boys, you know, just because that felt like that was comfortable.

I felt, you know, like I had a way in.