Angie

So my spirit, my motivation, my confidence, my self-worth was just crushed.

And I don't think...

That people realize how much verbal abuse has an impact on people.

I would rather get punched than verbally abused because the punches just kind of they wear off.

Right.

But the words have such a deeper impact.

You know, especially when they're met with such hate in their personality, in the way that they say it, you know, or how they're talking to you in such a derogatory way.

It has such a weight, you know, that I felt like for myself, it just cut me deeper than anything could ever do.

And it just made it that much harder to leave, you know, because...

There's so many unknowns, right?

Like, well, if I leave, am I going to be able to make it financially?

If I leave, am I going to meet somebody worse?

If I leave, am I going to be alone for the rest of my life?

If I leave, will I ever feel like myself?

Will I ever heal?

Will I ever...

Be better, you know?

So there's just so much unknowns and the feeling and the pressure of the unknown and the change is so scary sometimes that we rather sit in the misery because it's comfortable and it's familiar, you know, just like Sarah was kind of touching on.

So the year before I came into Harvest Home, I had relapsed and I had been hiding my use for the last year.

I was working, you know, I had a little job.