Anna Kai
Appearances
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
that's how she was brought up well that's how my mom and dad brought you up well no actually my parents are very progressive in the sense that they were never like you need to get married right away or anything like that for me what that really came from was i chose a very unconventional path out of college you know i got my bachelor's degree at nyu and i knew i wanted to go into entertainment and media so i came out of college and i was trying to be an actress
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And at the time I was doing a lot of gig work. I've done lots of random jobs to supplement my income. And I think my desire to find a husband was not so much the fact that like I needed to get married, but I desperately was searching for stability. And I did not have that in my career. So I was like, if a man can give that to me, that would be great. And it's not... That's not good.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Do not do that. So do as I say, not as I did. And I had to learn the hard way that that's not how you actually find the love of your life. It's not a coincidence that by the time I met Dave, I was 27, almost 28.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Um, I had been working, uh, my, my career that did really well in the city while I was acting was I got into real estate and that was actually a really great career for me because it was flexible. I love my company. And you're charming. Oh, thank you. You are. And
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I was good at it, which was for the first time. I mean, imagine going through your 20s, sucking at every job that pays you any amount of money, right? It was just a very demoralizing time in my life because I was a good student. I always did the right thing, but because I had this crazy dream, I then spent the rest of my 20s feeling like I was just a failure. So I was good at real estate.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I was finally earning a really great living. I had disposable income. And by the time I went on my date, my first date with my husband, I was like, I would love a boyfriend right now, but I don't need to invite chaos into my life. So if this isn't it, that's okay. And that's when it happens. That's when it happens. Exactly.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
not really working off their phone that's the big difference people ask you what you do and i feel you know i say i'm an influencer do you know what that is and some people do some people doing something not is not always an age thing of course like our generation yes but there are some people i talk to in their 40s and 50s they're like i kind of like know what you do but um yeah i think
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I don't need to be taken seriously because I'm like, my money speaks for itself right now. But it's like, it's crazy that we get to do this for a job. This is the best job in the whole world. Like, I never understand the people. They're like, it's being, it's so hard being an influencer. Like, yeah, there's really nerve wracking moments. It's inconsistent. It's like feast or famine.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I get all of that. But at the end of the day, I have done hard, shitty jobs. Okay. And this is not one of them. Right. And I always think that trying to become an influencer is really difficult. Being an influencer is easy. It's great. Yeah. You know, as long as you have a work ethic and you want to be creative, you know, of course, it's hard for you, Kim. Easy for me.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
It's a couple meanings, but yes, it does refer to my Chinese and American heritage. I'm very much cross-cultural. But I think it also, for me, it refers to the fact that women are very multifaceted. One of my favorite quotes is, do I contradict myself? Very well then, yes, I contradict myself. I am large. I contain multitudes, right? It was Walt Whitman, I believe, that said that.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
um it's either him or henry david thoreau it's one of those nobody was listening to this note yeah i remember they're not teaching it anymore but it's such a great line because i think Everybody is like, oh, you know, you're such a hypocrite if you want this and you want this. But I think people are so multifaceted.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
So I think women, you can want the family and the, you know, traditional nuclear life, but also want a career. Like, you know, I feel like for until very recently, women were pigeonholed into being one or the other. And you can kind of want it all. I don't think you can have it all all at the same time, but I think you can have it all eventually.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
They were very hands-off in the sense that my parents, I'm super close with them. I'm an only child, so they're my best friends, other than my husband, of course. And they were always very much, the way my dad describes it is, we raised you like the way we would let a weed grow, whichever way it wants to go, because we didn't believe in...
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
pushing you to be one way or another or get married when we wanted you or marry the person we wanted you to because at the end of the day we don't know we don't know what's good for you we don't know what you're good at and um that was a very atypical way of rearing an asian american daughter for their generation most of their peers
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
got their kids into SAT tutoring when they were, you know, in kindergarten. And they went, all their children went to much better schools than I did. You know, not that NYU is not a good school.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, but at the time, it's like, you know, they were all going to Ivy's, and they had their pick of the Ivy's. Right. They were just very much like, look, you were never inclined to do math or science. That wasn't what you were good at. If we had pushed you to do that, I wouldn't be here today.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
My success was very much built on the backs of my parents who said, we came here and did what we did not want to do so we could survive to give you the opportunity to pursue what you wanted to do. My dad was always like- It's terrific.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
yeah i mean it was amazing it's like and i hope to raise our children like that it's like he was like why would i know better for you right then you know for yourself i always knew you had a good head on your shoulders he was like if you were in the city doing drugs you know wasting your time that would be one thing yeah he's like i knew you were always trying to do something it was unconventional and you were trying to do something big so you failed for a while but he was like most entrepreneurs fail many times before they succeed
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
That's beautiful.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, but most of my friends met their husbands on dating apps. I don't even know how you meet in real life anymore, honestly.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, like set-ups. Fix-ups. Like, I don't have male friends, so who am I going to set my girlfriends up with? They don't have male friends.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Thank you so much for having me. I'm so excited to be here in sunny Florida.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I think that's great. I mean, sometimes I think that too much information on an app can be a little bit cumbersome because they see what Hinge and Bumble and everything are like now. And it's great. Like you get all this information, but it also you still don't know the person. Right. So it's a resume, a dating resume. So they can put whatever they want.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
But at the end of the day, they could want something else.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And they just know this is what looks good on paper. Exactly. Yeah. But, you know, for me, it's like the answer was always very simple. It's like, what are you looking for? A husband. OK, are you it? It's like, are you my mother? Right. Are you my husband? Like that's the next children's book for that.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
The option between New York and Florida was like 100% Florida in December.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And so like sometimes these questions, I'm like, just I hate talking about myself on those like prompts. Yeah, that's like it's so hard because like you have to be witty, funny, interesting. And I'm just like.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I mean, it should take an hour and 15. No way. No way. No way.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, that's fine. But I think dating via a committee decision is crazy because that just means that you, A, haven't figured out how to make your own decisions without a popular vote effectively, or you don't really like that person. So it's one or the other, both of which are not healthy. And friends, I love my girlfriends. They have very different tastes than men than me.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Especially this time of year.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And I would never go to them for advice on would you date this man? Because I wouldn't date their husbands. Their husbands are great people, but we wouldn't touch you with a 10-foot pole. We just have very different tastes in men. And I also think the other thing, not to get a little bit cynical about it, is especially like I have a lot of DMs from women
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I think it took me two hours and 15 minutes at the holidays to get from my house into the city. Correct.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
asking me for advice on friendships, female friendships, right? Because sometimes we get into toxic relationships with our female friends who are actually in competition with us and not in cooperation with us. And so if you're dating amazing guy and you've got sort of this codependent best friend, you know, my God, the way like women, especially in their
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Late teens, early 20s are obsessed with like, they're so possessive of their best friend. And another girl comes into the photo. It's like, well, she's my best friend.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
But every woman has been in that situation. It's like if your girlfriend is single and you meet an amazing guy and they're afraid they're going to lose you, of course they're going to say some shit to fuck it up, right? So, you know, it's like friends are great, but everybody's opinion is just that, an opinion. It's a subjective point of view.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
61 years. OK.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Right. I, you know, I've been with my husband for six years now. We don't do anything that is quote unquote Instagrammable, but I know he's there. I'm there. We show up for each other in the ways that matter and maybe not necessarily ways that look cute in social media.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
But again, these are things that if you're focusing on that, that's how I feel about when people get really their panties in a twist about like, it's easy.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
not posting me on his instagram it's like it's not actually about the little thing that you care about it's about the fact that at the crux of your relationship you do not feel that he cares about you so you're trying to you know grasp onto these little things to say well if he only did this then i would feel loved okay but then he would do that and it's like well i don't because he can yeah so yeah it's about the fact that you don't feel secure in a relationship
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I was like, why wouldn't you just fly into LaGuardia or JFK from here?
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Well, here's my caveat to that is I agree, you know, figure out how to feel secure in a relationship. And I up until the point where you said he takes a day to respond. I was like, you know, my husband's not he takes a day to respond. You are out of sight, out of mind. That's what I would say.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
You don't ever, no, no one needs a day to respond. Unless he's an ER surgeon, you know, and he's, you know.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Unless he's like, you know, in the secret, whatever, doesn't have access to a phone. If he's taking a day to respond, he doesn't care about you that much. My husband hates texting. does not like it as a form of communication, didn't text me all day every day from the first time we met, but he never made me wait that long. There was never a game.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
He always made sure I felt that I knew he was interested. So if you are feeling this, that's your intuition saying this guy's not that into you. You've been on five dates. You can. Here's would be my advice to her is that I would bring it up with him once. Say, look, I love being with you and it's great, but I don't like that you take so long to respond.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And this is something that I need not be like you need to do. It's like I need somebody who makes me feel seen, heard and appreciated when we're not together. And if that's not something that you're able to do right now, that's totally fine. But I want to be clear. So therefore, you're coming from a position of power as opposed to, well, why can't you do this, right?
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
It's like, and then maybe he'll be like, you might be surprised. Some men are just dense, right? So maybe let's give him the benefit of the doubt and say he doesn't understand, right? And maybe he gets better. But if he doesn't, that's your answer.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
That's your answer.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
You never be afraid to leave. Women screw themselves over so much by being afraid to leave because even five dates, it's like, oh, but I've already been on five dates with him. It's like it's a sunk cost. It's gone.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I agree with Grandma Gail. I don't think it's necessary. And I also think your boyfriend, that's different.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Do not let them in.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
pick you up don't tell them your address yeah exactly so yeah it's a case-by-case basis i don't think it's a deal breaker if that's important to you and you want your boyfriend that you've been in a relationship with to pick you up that's fine like yeah for me i'm just like whatever yeah exactly me too um going to the movies as a first date well you know i love the movies but i don't think that would be a first date anymore
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I don't think you should really need external entertainment on a first date. Sometimes guys would try to get creative. Like, let's go rock climbing. I'm like, I freaking hate rock climbing. We can't actually sit and talk. And that's... what's important, not the thing that you're doing.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
My husband asked for my parents' hand. Exactly. It was a moot point, but it's a nice gesture.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
That's a good thing.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
So I actually only knew my grandfather growing up because my paternal grandmother passed away and I was not in touch with my the maternal side. So that was pretty much I think the piece of advice that stuck with me the most is learning how to be lonely and really embrace that. And It's not that my grandfather necessarily gave me a ton of advice, but he lived by example.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
He was always like he was always telling my dad because my parents grew up in during the Cultural Revolution in China. And he was like, get out of here. Right. He was like, go somewhere else, you know, build. I mean, China today, my dad was like, I would have never left. But back then in the 90s, there were not that many, not much opportunity. So my grandfather was always saying, go to the U.S.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And I, you know, it sounds morbid, but it's kind of hilarious. He gave my dad this piece of advice. He's like, my parents came here on student visas. And he said, before you get your green card to my parents, do not come back even if I die. Doesn't matter. I'll be dead. Don't come back and risk not being able to re-enter the U.S. And I think it's that sense of just practicality.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Like we must keep moving forward instead of being sentimental, which a lot of people, once they get up there, it's sort of like, you know, you sort of not...
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
you stop living in reality he was very much always rooted in the president's like how do you make the president better by getting out there and just taking the risk and so i think that's how i've lived my life in the sense that it's like you got to try you know and he was always so proud of me even when there wasn't much to be proud of because he was like anna's making it work in new york do you know how difficult that is exactly right exactly thank you for sharing that i love it i love it yeah i love it
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I love what I do. I'm an influencer. It's like, so I'm working while I'm down here. You know, this is still a work week, but I can work from anywhere. So I just figured I'd take the last two weeks of the year and work from here because it's freezing up north right now. This time last year was super warm and now I'm just like frigid. So I'm happy to be here. Yeah.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Well, I think what's interesting is that I didn't realize you were 82, by the way. That's a lot older than you feel, honestly. A lot older than I feel, yes. Yeah, because I think a lot of people get into their 70s and 80s and they sort of write themselves off. They're like, well, I'm especially if you're here in Florida, it's like you're just. Yeah, that's why I'm so glad I have Kimmy.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, well, you golf, you live a very kind of, you know, routine life. That's wonderful. But you start to lose touch with what's going on. Right.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
She has no question. She's got everything down pat. I do actually have a question. Uh-oh. And it's not maybe quite so related to dating as to, you know, I lost my grandfather a year and a half ago. And it was actually pretty shocking to me how I felt about it because I always knew if things go according to plan, he's the first family member I'm going to lose.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And we should all be so lucky to pass away at 95. He passed away peacefully with, you know, the family in China by his side.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
a full life, right? But I had a really hard time coming to terms with the fact that everybody in my life that I love is going to die one day. How do you deal with that? Because you've lost now everybody.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
This is what happens. She gets very sentimental. I do too. And I'm like, we're not going to go there because it's like, I think about them. Like, I'm so close with my parents, right?
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Oh, that was a very different China.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Shanghai is amazing. It's amazing. Okay, we have to go.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Excuse my grandma, Shanghai version.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, if... It felt right. We did actually, my husband and I did, but that was more of a COVID thing. We sort of, he actually, we moved in with my parents for four months during COVID before we were engaged and we lived with them, which is great actually.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
It's actually very good to get to really know each other. He got to know my parents in a really, really intimate way that he wouldn't have if we hadn't had that time. So, yeah.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
look i know what i wanted to do but this is such a controversial topic i will say do whatever feels right to you if you feel more comfortable splitting fine for me i wanted the man to pay it's not that i wanted to not provide for myself it's that i just felt that the men who had a problem paying was an indication of something greater That was an issue.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
My parents always stressed being generous as a human, not just with your money, but with your time. If he can't be inconvenienced to pay for you at dinner, if he can, right? If you're both kind of... If he has the money to pay for your dinner, but he doesn't want to because he's like, well, why should I? That's indicative of a greater personality flaw.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Uh, we picked it together only because my husband was like, there's no way I'm doing this alone. Like you're going to wear this forever. And I'm, and it's beautiful. Thank you. He did a very nice job and I wanted to pick out my own ring. Like there's no way. That's interesting.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
It doesn't matter. Yeah. Who cares?
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Like it really doesn't matter what at what stage social media plays. I do think it would be very strange at this day and age to keep him a secret on social media until you're married.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
But, you know, I understand not wanting to post your significant other too soon in case it doesn't work out. So, you know, again, focus less on like that, the little things and just figure out how you feel. Right.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
You can find me across social channels at maybe both. And my podcast is Brutally Anna.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I just thought I wanted to do it. And I was having kind of a quarter life crisis. I was in my late 20s and then COVID hit and I turned 30 in the middle of a pandemic and I was unemployed. And I think most people would have just been like, all right, I will restart, get a new job. And I was like, instead of getting a normal job, I am going to start a blog.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Thank you.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
So my millennial ass started a WordPress when everybody was getting on TikTok at the time. Cause you know, 2020 during the pandemic is what we do. Exactly. So I just refuse to adopt new technology. This is why I belong like in Florida. I just want to like live here and be like, Yeah, but like very, very, I'm so bad with technology for how old I am.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
People are like, how do you not know how to do this? Like, I don't. And so I was like, I'll start a WordPress. I'll start an Instagram. And I tried to do home decor at first and it didn't really work out. And then I switched to fashion. And I actually did Instagram for two years before I made a TikTok very unsuccessfully. And then I created a TikTok that didn't go well for a while.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And I just decided to pivot. Instead of doing fashion content, I was like, let me upload a video talking about dating and relationships, and it went viral, and I was like, oh, this is what I should be doing. So yeah. You're our competition.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I dated a lot of men in my 20s, and I was always looking for my husband. I think a lot of women in their early 20s just want to be single for a while and have fun and date casually. And that was just never me. I would have been fine meeting my husband freshman year of college.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Like us. Like me. Yeah. I mean, I was like always just looking for my husband. And I think as a result, I just ended up getting into a lot of interesting situations with men that I probably shouldn't have been dating very long term. And I had shit to say, quite frankly, about it. And I was like, this is a topic that I can expound upon.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Because I think especially for women in their 20s in a major city, dating is just such a slog. Because it just takes such a toll on your self-confidence and just kind of your emotions. And I don't think it's quite the same for straight men anymore.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And I think that's just social conditioning and what women are taught, that our value lies, and especially us as millennials, our value lies in who wants us, right? And my husband was single for four and a half years before we met. He was dating, but he didn't get into any serious relationships. And I was like... did you go to therapy because you were single for four and a half years?
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
No, men don't think that way. They don't think that way. He's like, my mom started to get a little antsy, you know, but he was like, I just figured when I met the right person, I would settle down. And so I just thought there was something to say there. And I really try to approach my content from an empowerment perspective for women. And look, my my advice is for men, too.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I have a small percentage of male followers who at the end of the day,
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
How did you meet your husband? I met my husband on Bumble. So there's no story there. It wasn't a meet cute. It wasn't anything. It was very simple. We were a dating app match. And to your question, how you asked about, do you think we're kind of spoiled for choice? I think there's two things to my opinion is why millennials are getting married later and later.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
First of all, it's just expensive to start your life, honestly. And so I feel like a lot of millennials... are delaying marriage and kids and a family because they're really trying to get their careers in line first, especially men. I do sympathize with men, despite the fact that I trash a lot of douchey men on my content.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I sympathize with men in the sense that I feel like a lot of men feel the need to be in a financially stable provider.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Right. So a lot of them don't want to settle down until they feel like they can provide. And so I understand that. So I think that's part of the issue. But I do think the other part of it is we're really afraid of commitment as a generation in so much to the point. I talk about this a lot is that I don't believe in dating exclusively without labels.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I think that's such BS because it's something that we made up like millennials did, because dating is the trial phase for marriage. If monogamy and a traditional relationship is what you want, dating is a trial phase. You can always break up. But now we've invented this whole other phase prior to dating.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Yeah, and it's like you just don't... You can't be one foot in, one foot out. And I think if one person or both people are, that's just not the right person. It just has to be easy.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I really believe that at the end of the day, like if you're coming to me, which I love my community, but if you're coming to me, a random ass person on the Internet who's unqualified, who's never gone to school to be a therapist or anything for advice. on what to do with a man, it's most likely because you already know that relationship is somewhat over.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And you're just trying to figure out if there's any way to save it. Right.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
yeah and i think that was with my husband how long did you go out before we were only together for a few months before we made it official okay and it wasn't even like men are just so dense sometimes like i had a rule for myself that i would not get physically intimate with a guy until he was my boyfriend i was his girlfriend you were going to introduce me to people and that's kind of old school i know but i just knew that is not something i am interested i'm not interested
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
in casual sex right and you know a lot of women can have casual sex and not get emotionally attached that was never me again always looking for my husband trying to make every wrong man my husband and so I think it just wasn't a conversation at first and he was always just like and then it got to a point where we'd been dating for three or four months and he was like I what's going on with you?
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I think he thought I was like super religious or like maybe I was a virgin or something like that. I was like, no, here's my role. And if you are not there yet, that's fine. I'm happy to continue seeing you. We just can't be physically intimate. And he was like, oh, that's it. He was like, I just assumed we were already dating and boyfriend girlfriend.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
I was like, no, you have to have the conversation. Right. So that's kind of how it came about. So he always likes to joke. He's like, you asked me to be your boyfriend. I was like, I did not ask you to, you know. I think that's kind of where it started. So it was very easy. It was very organic. We were together for four years before we got married.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
And then we've been married for the last two years.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
We do not... love a international travel and be like your dad yeah travel that requires a long flight it's just not our cup of tea um so we were thinking where can we go that still feels like like a vacation a vacation but within the continental u.s and preferably in the same time zone and um you know we have family down here so we've been to the breakers i was like i would love to just
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
spend like a week at the breakers yeah I did and it was the most magical week ever because the restaurants are amazing right looks like you're in Europe uh-huh the service is amazing it is my happy place down here what are some of your favorite spots Flagler Steakhouse. Oh, that's Kimmy's too.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Love a good HMF moment for pre-dinner cocktails. That was our little thing. We would love to go to HMF for cocktails before dinner and then we'd go back to HMF after dinner. After dinner. Love seafood bar for lunch. I feel like it's
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
still a little bit of a hidden gem though because you know generally like New Yorkers go to Miami and I well that's a very different vibe no interest at this stage of my life I am like I have no interest in Miami it's just way too much of a party scene for me like it's mostly night life exactly but you know there is life here.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
My girlfriend had her 35th birthday here, so we did a girl's trip down here. We stayed at the White Elephant.
Excuse My Grandma
Please Excuse My Grandma While We Get Brutally Honest About Love With Anna Kai
Kuchina's a theme. Well, that's the only option. That is the only option, but it's enough for me. I don't need to go out more than one night.