Arthur C. Brooks

And so we look in the mirror and say, that's what I want.

But that's not what you want.

That's not what you want.

So ask, that means that that's when you put out an all points bulletin to your friends, your family, to everybody else to say, I want you to find the best person you can possibly find for me.

I'm willing to take a chance on people that you think are really great for me.

And again, you're going to kiss a lot of frogs.

But that's part of the deal.

You kiss a lot of frogs.

What your friends and family are not going to find for you is what we call the dark triad, which is somebody who's very high in narcissism, Machiavellianism, and traits of psychopathy, who has psychopathic traits.

That's 7% of the population.

Yeah.

Let's just call that for everybody watching, that's your first husband.

I mean, there's a lot of that.

And women find this unbelievably seductive because guys who are very narcissistic, Machiavellian, meaning they're willing to hurt you, and they're psychopathic, not like ax murderers, but they're pretty remorseless and unempathetic.

They prey on women who really, really, really want to fall in love.

And when people are setting you up, they're not going to do that.

They know when somebody's a weirdo.

You don't because you're blind to it.

Well, to begin with, you have some bad experiences and you get some battle scars is what it comes down to.

And then you make, you start thinking, you think retrospectively about what went wrong in your relationships.