Ash Kelley
👤 SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
He was rich, greedy, and evil, and worshipped Satan.
And he got excommunicated from the Catholic Church, which I think happens pretty easily.
So, like, he was pretty chill overall, but he got sent to live in the forest.
So far, I don't see the issue.
So, they made him go to the forest, where he prayed upon children...
and disguised himself as a scarecrow with straw jetting out from his clothing.
One day he was about to eat a boy he captured, but he got struck by lightning and was killed.
Yeah, you know, I hate when I'm about to have a good snack and I just get struck by lightning and die.
So yeah, he died, but still he lives on and he visits young children before Christmas dressed as a scarecrow still to scare them to be good.
Yeah, with a brand new rap.
With a brand new set of wrapping paper.