Bela Gandhi

So when I started dating in high school and college, my dad would tell me, the rule number one of success is marry the right person.

This one decision will determine 90% of your happiness or 90% of your misery.

And I thought, okay, well, after a series of dating people that I fought,

Like this feels like what it says it should be in the movies.

I have butterflies and there's grandiose gestures and it's fun and it's romantic.

And then suddenly the person ghosts me or I get broken up with four months in with no like yesterday.

You were the coolest girlfriend in the world.

And today you're annoying.

It's like, wait, what's happening?

And so I went I was in business school and I and my I asked my parents.

They're like, we don't know.

You just know.

And I was like, well, I don't just know.

Clearly, I'm not doing something right.

And so I started studying relationships.

I started looking at attachment theory and psychology and neuroscience.

So I put together my own little method and what I call I'm going to find an elevator person for me.

And so I started dating someone that I had been friends with for six years at that time.

And we started dating right after college.

Three years later, we got married.