Ben Nemtin
speaker
121 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard May 2025
last heard May 2025
Ben Nemtin’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And then they started to email us and they looked at our list and they said, hey, I can help you cross off, ride a boat. I can help you cross off, get up on a hot air balloon. I can help you cross off, make a toast to a stranger's wedding. And then they would send us their dreams asking for our help.
and so we struck this nerve and we just thought let's keep doing this and so this two-week road trip ended up lasting over 10 years and then the list items that we had written down in the beginning that we were convinced were completely unattainable over time they ended up falling off the list and so
we also realized that helping other people achieve their dreams meant even more than doing the big things on our list. And then along the way, like built this passion for like figuring out why do some people achieve their goals and go after them? But most people don't like,
Why are 76% of the people on the planet reaching their deathbed and regretting the things they didn't do, not the things they did? And so that's why I started to speak because I was like, okay, we need to get more people in that minority of the population that actually go after the things and be true to yourself. And really a bucket list is just a reflection of your true self.
That's the way I look at it. It's just a list of all the things that are going to bring you joy and happiness. So it's not just skydive and go to Europe. That's one of 10 categories of your life. So you want to think about your adventure travel goals, but you also want to think about your mental health goals, your physical health goals.
You want to think about how do you want to give back, your relationship goals, intellectual, what do you want to learn, financial, professional. And so that's what a full bucket list is. But When we were on that road trip, we had no idea of any of that. We were just going out to tackle our dreams and help other people. And it sparked this lifelong learning journey.
The only way that we cross things off our list is through the help of other people. I just want to be very clear on that. We had no business or no ability to achieve any of the things that we have achieved, but people always stepped up to help us in unexpected ways because we shared our goals. And I think that you had the idea for this podcast. 99% of people will have the idea.
They'll want to do it, but they won't take that first step because of fear, right? They're afraid of failure. They're afraid of what other people think. And that's ultimately what stops people. And that's through research. And we can talk about like where that comes from, but that's the number one barrier when it comes to stopping people from achieving their personal goals.
But when you don't put it out there, no one can help you. You're on your own. And if you think about it, when you hit a challenge at work, typically, what do you do? You go to your leader, you ask for help, go to a mentor. Hey, have you ever been through this? I don't know what to do. You ask a friend. But with these personal goals, we don't ask for help because of the fear.
We're afraid of failure, afraid of what other people think. And then we just have a lower chances of succeeding because we're trying to do it in our head on our own. So I always say when you give someone a chance to be a hero, they usually take it. And so you experienced this when you started to put this, it's how you took the leap.
You move through that discomfort of like, oh shit, like what are people, is this going to be good? What if it's bad and it fails? And- Then you started to see that people were gravitating towards it because you were doing it from your true, it came out of what you truly wanted to do. This is a reflection of your true self.
And I think that at the end of the day, that is the big goal is to be true to yourself in a world that is so hard to stay true to yourself because everything pulls you away from that. Social media pulls you away from that. You know, being disconnected pulls you away from that. The fear pulls you away from that. But when you are true to yourself, I think you're unstoppable.
You are the only person that can be you. And we spend most of our life trying to be other people. And anything you could do to remind yourself of who you are. And that's why I think a list is a great device to remind you. friends that keep you accountable to these things are great reminders.
What you saw is that when you were true to yourself and then you started to do this thing, it was like this gravitational pull. And then you start to see this thing happening and then you follow that momentum. And I think that sometimes we feel like we have this plan and we got to stick to it.
And I've done that a lot, but I've realized that you need to follow the energy and you need to follow what's easy and what was easy for you. Not that it is easy as in
it didn't take a lot of work easy and is as in you saw there was momentum and that's what you followed and so for me that's been speaking i didn't mean to be a speaker but i did a tedx talk and then some people asked me to speak and i love doing it and i feel like it's easy for me to do and i work really hard but i see that it's working and so i thought okay i'm going to leave the pro i started a production company with the three buddies that we started the buried life with after the show and i left that production company
which is very hard to do speaking because I could see that it was, that was more true to me.
Yeah, great point. So I think that it's not selfish to pursue your personal goals because you can't take care of other people if you don't take care of yourself. You can't do your job if you don't take care of yourself. You can't be who you need to be if you're not fueling yourself. And one way you fuel yourself is by doing the things that you love.
So there's this big tie between purpose and your mental health that I think a lot of people are missing. And when you are following the things that you love that are important to you, that means something to you, that gives you a greater sense of well-being, that contributes to your mental health, and it energizes you.
So I think that we need to flip our thinking around this idea that it's selfish to do these things. And I get it. I used to think a bucket list was selfish, considering all my responsibilities, everything that I had to do every day. But then I started to notice that people around the world were going after their bucket list just because we were going after ours.
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