Bill Burr

Fuck this guy.

So...

The problem is, is you moved in with the guy.

So if you break up with the guy, what are you going to go into another room?

And then you got to worry about this guy, you know, doing God knows what.

Um, do you have any male friends?

Do you have a brother?

Somebody, you know, they can help protect you when you get your shit out of there.

I would get another fuck.

I mean, this is the type of situation I wouldn't fuck your pride.

I would move back in with my parents if I had to and drive longer to work.

Get the fuck out of that.

Um,

And I mean, it's the easiest breakup ever as far as the reasons.

I don't know, because you don't trust me because you think I'm fucking your cousin to the point you're acting like Jeff Goldblum in the fly and start punching the goddamn door jams out.

Oh, and by the way, it's 90 degrees out and I can't wear shorts because you and your fragile ego can't fucking handle it.

And I wouldn't say it this way because this guy sounds like a lunatic.

Yeah.

I don't know, what could you say that would just make this guy go away?

Just say, ah, you know, I just decided that I want to get really fat and wear shorts.