Bree Thomasel

LAUGHTER And then there was fellow ex-radio announcer Sharon Casey.

Now, look, Sharon, I know you didn't really take the piss out of me tonight and I don't want to take the piss out of you either because clearly your hairdresser's already done that.

Did you show her a picture of Lord Farquaad and say, I'll have what he's having?

You look like Professor Snape's dad.

And now to the man of the hour, my co-host friend, the boring to my funny, Clint and Paul Roberts.

Clint famously has the tiniest nipples ever documented on a grown man.

And you know what they say about tiny nipples?

Tiny dick.

And it's true.

I accidentally saw it one time and I thought it was a garnish.

Clint's dick is so small even Jetstar allow him to take it on board as carry-on.

Clint's dick is so small it's allowed to order off the kids menu.

Fun fact about Clint, he's actually a bit of a prude, which has meant that over the years I've been banned from talking about certain things on the radio.

This is serious.

And, Clint, I'm not going to talk about those things tonight because I'm a friend.

I'm definitely not going to talk about the time you drank horse semen at the Hokitika Wild Foods Festival.

I'm not going to talk about it.

I'm also not going to talk about the time you shaved your pubes into towels and thought it was appropriate to then use that towel to dry your face.

And I'm definitely not going to talk about the time as a 19-year-old Clint went to a radio survey party and hooked up with a 50-year-old woman from HR.

LAUGHTER