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5347 total appearances

Appearances Over Time

Podcast Appearances

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

The first condition is the coach has to be only moderately angry, not too angry.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

So they're not berating you to the point of shaming you.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

They're kind of firing you up by saying, we got to do better.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

This was not good enough.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

And secondly, and I think this is the real kicker,

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

they have to be not normally angry.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

So they're not tyrants.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

Oh my God, I love this.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

They're not typically out of control.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

This is a situationally appropriate response from somebody for whom this is out of character.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

And so, wow, we must be really blowing it that our level-headed, calm coach is,

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

is now a little bit worked up and we need to rise to this occasion.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

And I mean, to me, that research just decimates the Bobby Knight style of coaching and leadership and says, you actually want the person who, to the point you were making earlier, you want the coach who makes the team feel safe and sets high standards of discipline and performance.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

That's it.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

Oh my God, I love this.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

I love this.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

One of the best angry halftime speeches that I've ever heard in like real time because I was there working with this team was a coach who rarely if ever raised his voice.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

And he said, and he had tears in his eyes and he said, I'm so effing angry that

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

You're letting yourselves down.

The Curiosity Shop with Brené Brown and Adam Grant
Why Toughness and Kindness Need Each Other | The Curiosity Shop

You're disappointing yourselves.