Brendan Sagalow

That's pretty sweet.

Yeah, and then some disgusting woman came out, and she was wearing little tiny leopard shorts that was very revealing, and I was like, oh, God, I think I'm in a thing.

But I go...

Can I see your certificate of misogyny?

And then what really tipped me off is when she jerked me off.

Yeah, that was another tip too.

I mean, she goes, all right, take off all your clothes.

And I took off all my clothes and I was in my boxers and she went, take those off.

And I went, okay.

That's when I was like... Did you get naked in front of her?

I got naked in front of her, yeah.

That was when I was like...

I don't think this lady's a doctor.

Yeah, she walked out, and the real massage person came in and went, ready for your massage?

Yeah, but it was horrible.

Oh, it was horrible.

And I was like, OK, that's another telltale sign that this is bad.

Then she was massaging my legs and I had spoken to a buddy of ours.

I think I don't want me into it.

Our buddy Ian, who had done this before, kind of addicted to it at one point, I'm pretty sure.