Cara Delevingne

You actually, I'm like, who the hell?

I haven't processed any of this yet.

This is all a mess.

And I'm, none of these things or all of them, I really felt like such a shell at that point.

And a real like, I remember writing a lot about how I just was a mirror of everyone I'd ever met and there was nothing underneath it.

I was just an empty vessel, not to be depressing about it, but especially with dating.

Oh my God, I...

Yeah, it's rough because, again, I didn't want to be gay.

I really wanted to fit in with people.

I didn't know any gay people.

I...

wasn't straight but I really like and especially in something you've been so incredible and talking about like I never knew how to ask for what I wanted and it was very much a performative thing that I would be like whatever this guy and to the point where it's like you know whether it's sexual assault or it's like to the point where you're just like oh I'm just abusing myself to

to to basically make someone happy if you want to have sex with me i should feel lucky for that like that kind of thing horrible but then you know i discovered more about my sexuality through sleeping with my friends because there was a safety in that that also didn't mean we were gay you know we all had boyfriends but

Whatever, you know, whatever happens when the lights go off, that doesn't really mean anything.

But then I started to look back on when I was a kid and I was like, I always had this thing where with like friends of mine, I just think I cared about them more than they cared about me.

But then I also realized that any man I'd ever been with, and I feel very bad for these men because they'd always...

I think I'd play such a role of this cool girl who loved to play video games and would let them flirt with people, but was just like so cool and chill that they would fall in love with me.

But I was so pretending to be something I wasn't.

And I just felt, I felt, I feel, any man that I hurt, I feel really bad because I did take these actually very nice guys for a ride because I didn't know.

And I also...