Cara Delevingne

And I didn't know how I felt about it, but I also wasn't asked or wasn't allowed to feel.

And also, she was so sick, so I couldn't

make it about me, I just had to look after her.

And that, I was actually really good at it.

Like I loved doing it, but she, it overtook everything to the point where like, I just, I still am really trying to learn how to look after myself at 30 fucking three.

Sorry, excuse me.

Can I swear?

I forget every time.

It felt normal.

It felt normal until, you know, being at a certain age where you're told your mom's gonna die and being in hospital and being like, huh?

Like, I don't understand what that means.

And also the very, very physical, visceral memory of...

her being away a lot and you know either being in hospital or in rehab of some sort and that feeling of not knowing where she was no one told me so i just thought she was dead and i didn't understand so

And that's when that kind of thing of like trying to control the uncontrollable would come in where like I just would stop eating at seven and like just be on a hunger strike because I didn't know where my mother was.

I was not going to eat because that to me was the only thing I had control over.

No, I didn't.

I just I don't know.

Sure.

Again, I don't remember.

And I think my dad, we all have very different memories of this.