Caroline Foran

You can tolerate it a bit more.

How amazing for her to get that gift from you, though, that she probably felt that her whole life.

I know.

And never had the words and never connected the dots.

And I think that's a huge part of we talked about, like maybe why we're feeling so anxious these days.

I think it's an invisible layer is our responsibility, not just for, you know, I'm a parent now to a child and that's a whole other thing.

But.

healing ourselves from our childhood and breaking generational cycles and even the word generational trauma sounds like heavy but it actually it is significant because we were I was I mean my parents did their best with the information they had but I remember feeling like as a kid like I need and I didn't feel well and I needed my mommy and I just I would have given anything just crawl into the bed beside her I remember like it never would have occurred to me to ask for that or do that because I wanted to and I had to be a good girl and

I do think there's silent, quietly building layers there of needs that were not met and feelings that were not explored as kids.

And it's no wonder I think our generation, it came to a head when we were in our 20s because that's when we started to learn a bit about it.

Like I've had it before.

And I'm always like, I've obviously, I've teased apart my own childhood because I really felt like, well, there has to be something that could make sense because I felt like I was kind of embarrassed to have fallen apart for no good reason.

I was looking for something and I felt like it was silly to try and

chart my childhood when it all looked really good and I didn't want my parents to feel bad but there were little moments here and there where I know as a sensitive child that I probably needed more but we wouldn't have had that awareness at the time so I definitely do not blame and I'm arguably we have too much information now I do I do not blame my parents um because I think it's just the way I came into the world

No, I would have probably blamed myself.

And I think because of my experience with anxiety when it came to my son, there was a tendency to think that it was my doing.

And then getting the diagnosis of autism for him helped me.

How old is he?

He's five.

And the first thing I said to my husband when we got the diagnosis, which we knew we would get.