Charlotte Cummings

Yeah.

Our lives don't need to be dictated by these things that we're scared of because it's kind of like the monster under the bed where you're really, really scared of feeling this feeling.

Like, I can't feel that.

That is too scary for me.

It's too much for me.

And then actually what happens for people is when they do feel it, when we do expose them to the feeling, they go, oh, that's actually not that bad.

It's actually just unpleasant like other feelings I want to avoid bumping into through my life.

And I don't need to be so on the run from this.

Does that happen?

Yeah.

And I think you can kind of sniff out unbearable feelings when you're a therapist.

Like, you know, you're looking at people going, hmm, how's that working out for you?

You know, what might be going on there?

You definitely kind of can spot these things quite quickly 20 years into the therapy game.

Our unbearable feeling is the thing that stands between us and our goals.

So if there are things that you're wanting to achieve in life that you just haven't been able to achieve, things that you need to do for yourself or that you want to do for yourself, dreams that you have, this unbearable feeling is, I promise you, the thing that is standing in your way.

Because if you could allow yourself to feel that feeling, if you could risk the feeling and feel it to some extent and get over that fear that you have of the feeling, then you can make your way towards those things that you want or those things that are good for you.

Absolutely.

This is it.

This is the thing that is behind why you do what you do when you know what you know.