Chelsea Fagan

I don't want to discount any of that.

However, at the same time, to your point about wanting to completely avoid it, wanting to not even be aware of the numbers, never have the conversation, not be part of these decisions is

At a certain point, we have to hold ourselves accountable as women and say it's barely been 50 years that we can even have a credit card, that we can own property, that we can do things in our own name.

be so eager to give up all of that and to go back into this place of voluntary helplessness and voluntary ignorance in service of a very specific kind of love to me is we just can't allow ourselves to do that.

We can't.

And that is why I feel that so many of these romantic stories that we're told are so inherently conservative because even in the ones where the men are

They're not princes or mafia bosses, as you pointed out, or any of these things.

almost never is money ever even addressed.

The underlying assumption is that if the love is good, if it's a true love story, money won't be a problem.

It won't come up.

It won't be a problem.

And I, I think that that desire to it's to me, it's not that different from, you know, the girl math stuff, or you'll see videos like I, I, I let him buy what he wants at the boy's store so I can get what I want at the girl's store and like all of that kind of stuff.

To me, it just all comes down to this idea of love means on some level the woman infantilizing herself and remaining voluntarily ignorant.

And I, unfortunately, especially when that is done totally willingly and with no external financial necessity to do so, I find that, unfortunately, it's just sometimes you got to take the hard lessons.

I think it's a big part of it.

And I think a lot of what you've touched on there is definitely financial in nature.

But I actually think that when you look at the way that we celebrate women and what we celebrate them for, it's all marriage and children, right?

That's it.

That's really, that's where we throw the party.

That's where we like all the photos.