Chelsea Handler
π€ SpeakerAppearances Over Time
Podcast Appearances
They're not going to not because you're calling them. Are you talking about 50 Cent? No, no, no. He was beautiful. He was a sweetheart. He was so sweet. Yeah. I bring it up every time I talk to you. A lot of people bring that up. People seem to really like that story. I wonder why. Why do you think that is? I just think...
Well, yeah, I hear what you're saying. He was a sweetheart. All my friends when I dated him just fucking loved it because he'd come over to our house every night and he'd have like a Lamborghini one day and then like a yellow Ferrari the next day. Meanwhile, I realized he was borrowing all these cars from different dealerships. I was like, you can do that? I'm like, oh. And then I got a Bentley.
Well, yeah, I hear what you're saying. He was a sweetheart. All my friends when I dated him just fucking loved it because he'd come over to our house every night and he'd have like a Lamborghini one day and then like a yellow Ferrari the next day. Meanwhile, I realized he was borrowing all these cars from different dealerships. I was like, you can do that? I'm like, oh. And then I got a Bentley.
Well, yeah, I hear what you're saying. He was a sweetheart. All my friends when I dated him just fucking loved it because he'd come over to our house every night and he'd have like a Lamborghini one day and then like a yellow Ferrari the next day. Meanwhile, I realized he was borrowing all these cars from different dealerships. I was like, you can do that? I'm like, oh. And then I got a Bentley.
I got a chocolate Bentley because he kept coming over every night and he'd have a different car. So as a joke, I went and bought a chocolate Bentley. I didn't know you could borrow cars. and as a celebrity. So I went and bought a chocolate Bentley and then we broke up. So there I am stuck with this chocolate Bentley like a fucking white dumb bitch asshole driving around like I'm some rapper.
I got a chocolate Bentley because he kept coming over every night and he'd have a different car. So as a joke, I went and bought a chocolate Bentley. I didn't know you could borrow cars. and as a celebrity. So I went and bought a chocolate Bentley and then we broke up. So there I am stuck with this chocolate Bentley like a fucking white dumb bitch asshole driving around like I'm some rapper.
I got a chocolate Bentley because he kept coming over every night and he'd have a different car. So as a joke, I went and bought a chocolate Bentley. I didn't know you could borrow cars. and as a celebrity. So I went and bought a chocolate Bentley and then we broke up. So there I am stuck with this chocolate Bentley like a fucking white dumb bitch asshole driving around like I'm some rapper.
And I had that Bentley, which was a really nice car by the way, I had that Bentley for like two years.
And I had that Bentley, which was a really nice car by the way, I had that Bentley for like two years.
And I had that Bentley, which was a really nice car by the way, I had that Bentley for like two years.
I bought an ex-boyfriend, the toxic one, actually. Okay. He has a house in upstate New York and like an estate. And I knew I had to break up with him at some point, but I wanted him to really feel it, you know? And I bought... Go out with a bang. I bought... He had this huge drive that led up to his estate. And it is an estate. I use that word because that's what it is. It's a huge farm.
I bought an ex-boyfriend, the toxic one, actually. Okay. He has a house in upstate New York and like an estate. And I knew I had to break up with him at some point, but I wanted him to really feel it, you know? And I bought... Go out with a bang. I bought... He had this huge drive that led up to his estate. And it is an estate. I use that word because that's what it is. It's a huge farm.
I bought an ex-boyfriend, the toxic one, actually. Okay. He has a house in upstate New York and like an estate. And I knew I had to break up with him at some point, but I wanted him to really feel it, you know? And I bought... Go out with a bang. I bought... He had this huge drive that led up to his estate. And it is an estate. I use that word because that's what it is. It's a huge farm.
It's gorgeous. It's on the Hudson River. And I bought him 35 linden trees that I'm pretty sure I imported from Germany at the time. Very extravagant. How expensive is that? Who knows? And I had... like 17 put lined on either side of the driveway so that they would grow and form a canopy so that when you drove in, you drive into his house under this alley of trees.
It's gorgeous. It's on the Hudson River. And I bought him 35 linden trees that I'm pretty sure I imported from Germany at the time. Very extravagant. How expensive is that? Who knows? And I had... like 17 put lined on either side of the driveway so that they would grow and form a canopy so that when you drove in, you drive into his house under this alley of trees.
It's gorgeous. It's on the Hudson River. And I bought him 35 linden trees that I'm pretty sure I imported from Germany at the time. Very extravagant. How expensive is that? Who knows? And I had... like 17 put lined on either side of the driveway so that they would grow and form a canopy so that when you drove in, you drive into his house under this alley of trees.
And I knew that every winter, I mean that every spring and every fall, the leaves would change and bloom and, and it would be beautiful. And that everyone who saw them would be like, where, where did you get these trees? And every winter, I mean, sorry, every fall and every spring I get a text from him. Shut the fuck up. Going, I can't believe I lost you. Look at your trees.
And I knew that every winter, I mean that every spring and every fall, the leaves would change and bloom and, and it would be beautiful. And that everyone who saw them would be like, where, where did you get these trees? And every winter, I mean, sorry, every fall and every spring I get a text from him. Shut the fuck up. Going, I can't believe I lost you. Look at your trees.
And I knew that every winter, I mean that every spring and every fall, the leaves would change and bloom and, and it would be beautiful. And that everyone who saw them would be like, where, where did you get these trees? And every winter, I mean, sorry, every fall and every spring I get a text from him. Shut the fuck up. Going, I can't believe I lost you. Look at your trees.
Do you want to come see them? And I'm always like, not interested. That was just a message to you. You're good. That was a good breakup.