Chris Ames

My haters and rivals.

many of which are here this evening, have tried to discredit this award, pointing to the slightly oxymoronic quality of best unpublished, saying that's like being what, like the most conventionally attractive person at a speed dating mixer, or like being the most ornately decorated piece of fish still rotating alone on the sushi train.

but I strongly disagree.

I'll tell you the same thing I tell my wife when she questions my incessant high-risk sports betting.

It actually takes a tremendous amount of courage to put money on an underdog.