Chuck Bryant

But it's a really compelling article and it's definitely worth reading.

And it provides this kind of alternative idea that like, no, there's definitely situations where some people don't deserve your forgiveness.

One of the chief among them is if you say like a sibling or a family member of some sort.

you have like some sort of falling out with or they've wronged you and you choose not to forgive them, you might feel tremendous pressure from the rest of your family to just go ahead and forgive them.

That's a terrible reason to forgive somebody.

And if you do forgive them under those circumstances or say because your religion decrees it,

you're like, that's not full forgiveness.

And it may actually harm you because you may suffer from a distorted self-image or lowered self-respect because you basically went back to this person who not only wronged you in the past, is unrepentant about it, but is just going to continue the behavior again in the future.

So there's definitely instances where

Like you probably shouldn't forgive, but that doesn't mean that you should be stuck in resentment and anger and letting that person have power over your life.

You might just need to move on without them and without forgiving them.

And you can make that work as well.

Yeah, I mean, there was that one terrible story that you sent about the woman who, as a child, had this terribly bullying and abusive older brother.

And we won't even talk about the awful things this guy did, but the parents were really always pushing like, oh, he just doesn't know how to say he loves you.

He doesn't know how to talk to you, so he does these things, and you really need to forgive him.

And that's just, that's bonkers.

That is a situation where you were doing such great harm as a parent

to teach her daughter to accept this kind of behavior.

Right.

And not only accept it, but forgive it.