Clare Stephens

speaker

4,507 appearances 20 recordings 1 series first heard Mar 2026 last heard 3 Jul

Clare Stephens’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.

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recordings per month · last 12 months

Recordings per month over the last 12 months — 20 in all, peaking in Apr 2026 with 7.

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Mamamia Out Loud · Spoiled Pig Syndrome & Our List Of Things That Are Just Not Working · 5 Jun 2026 podcast

principle of human relationships is reciprocity.

It just has to be that you do something for somebody else and they do something for you.

Obviously, that becomes a little bit more complicated with a child, say, when a newborn, they can't give you much.

But the kind of social contract for those relationships is over decades and a lifetime.

The idea that a normal, well-adapted human will ultimately do something for you if you've done something for them.

I think we see it in our lives with the people who are the biggest people pleasers.

And I include myself in this to some degree.

I'm quite lazy and I think that stops me from doing too much for other people.

But sometimes I do get into the martyr complex and you see how it

impacts how people treat you.

They then have an expectation of what you will do for them, no questions asked.

And it's such a dynamic though, that there are certain relationships in your life where you have this dynamic.

And it almost becomes, even if you're the same age, it becomes almost like a parent-child dynamic.

And it's quite worrying.

But I think this kind of extends to the fact that with any, I have a theory that with any person, whether they're a child or a teenager or a pig, not a person, but a pig, a dog, anything like that,

You should be asking people to lift to the very upper limit of what they're capable of.

And if you don't do that, you're doing a disservice to them.

And I think there is – it's an ambiguous space in every romantic relationship because – and I think you guys have talked about it on this show that like –

In an ideal relationship, it's not kind of giving 50-50.

It's each party giving like 100%.

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