Clark Fredericks

We're buying ounces of Coke at a time. You know, like all our friends party. We might as well get extra ecstasy. So we have it for everybody. I'm like, that's a great idea. So it's always there. When you got a suitcase in your basement with three, four ounces of Coke in it always, it's just that you can hear it calling you. It's like, come down and do a bump.

We're buying ounces of Coke at a time. You know, like all our friends party. We might as well get extra ecstasy. So we have it for everybody. I'm like, that's a great idea. So it's always there. When you got a suitcase in your basement with three, four ounces of Coke in it always, it's just that you can hear it calling you. It's like, come down and do a bump.

So yeah, so those years quickly became a blur. Yeah.

So yeah, so those years quickly became a blur. Yeah.

Yeah. Well, your boundaries get ripped from you. So then you don't even know what a boundary means. You know, like I would say I had boundaries, but I blew through every boundary I set for myself, you know, over the years. All right, cocaine is a weekend drug only. And then you're doing coke every day of the week. So that boundary just got shot to hell.

Yeah. Well, your boundaries get ripped from you. So then you don't even know what a boundary means. You know, like I would say I had boundaries, but I blew through every boundary I set for myself, you know, over the years. All right, cocaine is a weekend drug only. And then you're doing coke every day of the week. So that boundary just got shot to hell.

Drinking is only if you're going out with the guys or on the weekends with your girl and the guys. And most definitely never before work. And then you're drinking before work. You know, just to get yourself going in the morning. Heroin is only for people on Skid Row and Kensington Avenue in Philly and in New York City. You know, a well-educated middle class guy will absolutely not do heroin.

Drinking is only if you're going out with the guys or on the weekends with your girl and the guys. And most definitely never before work. And then you're drinking before work. You know, just to get yourself going in the morning. Heroin is only for people on Skid Row and Kensington Avenue in Philly and in New York City. You know, a well-educated middle class guy will absolutely not do heroin.

And I'm doing heroin. Yeah. You know, like, so just nothing, nothing stuck. I couldn't, I couldn't set a boundary that I could live within. Like it just, they were meaningless to me.

And I'm doing heroin. Yeah. You know, like, so just nothing, nothing stuck. I couldn't, I couldn't set a boundary that I could live within. Like it just, they were meaningless to me.

You know, cause if, if I felt uncomfortable, like we got to fix this uncomfortable feeling. And you know, like I went, I was never arrested. I had no criminal charges, you know, throughout my life. But I was right there. I was right on the edge. I was importing steroids, doing steroids in my 30s. And Homeland Security confiscates a package of them. And I get this threatening letter.

You know, cause if, if I felt uncomfortable, like we got to fix this uncomfortable feeling. And you know, like I went, I was never arrested. I had no criminal charges, you know, throughout my life. But I was right there. I was right on the edge. I was importing steroids, doing steroids in my 30s. And Homeland Security confiscates a package of them. And I get this threatening letter.

You basically get a get-out-of-jail-free card, one get-out-of-jail-free card. I started like after all the women, nonstop women in my 20s, I started gambling, like going to the casinos like every weekend. That became my new coping mechanism. You know, like when you would step through the doors of the casino and the sounds and the cock Cocktail waitresses. Cigarettes.

You basically get a get-out-of-jail-free card, one get-out-of-jail-free card. I started like after all the women, nonstop women in my 20s, I started gambling, like going to the casinos like every weekend. That became my new coping mechanism. You know, like when you would step through the doors of the casino and the sounds and the cock Cocktail waitresses. Cigarettes.

And the win or loss, the adrenaline flowing, all your shit just dissipates, just goes away as soon as you would step into that environment. So that was like, that felt like home to me. And, you know, so I'm doing that for years. You know, that became years of like gambling. Yeah. And that's how I bought my Harley. Like, you know, I came home, you know, like with $50,000.

And the win or loss, the adrenaline flowing, all your shit just dissipates, just goes away as soon as you would step into that environment. So that was like, that felt like home to me. And, you know, so I'm doing that for years. You know, that became years of like gambling. Yeah. And that's how I bought my Harley. Like, you know, I came home, you know, like with $50,000.

I stopped at a Harley Davidson dealership. I handed the guy $22,000 cash and picked up a Harley a couple days later. Wow. I'm making $700 a week in the tire business. You know, like I eventually, after the construction thing, I'm doing nothing. I'm unemployed for six months. And my brother comes to me when I was around 30 and says, you know, like... uh, you're not doing anything.

I stopped at a Harley Davidson dealership. I handed the guy $22,000 cash and picked up a Harley a couple days later. Wow. I'm making $700 a week in the tire business. You know, like I eventually, after the construction thing, I'm doing nothing. I'm unemployed for six months. And my brother comes to me when I was around 30 and says, you know, like... uh, you're not doing anything.

He goes, you want to open up a retread shop again? He's like, you and I, he goes, I got my retail store and I'm thinking about a retread shop. And you know, you and I will, we'll do that. I'm like, I had nothing else going on. I'm unemployed. I'm like, fuck it. Let's do it. You know? So, uh, I'm making $700 a week, and yet I'm winning and losing tens of thousands of dollars.

He goes, you want to open up a retread shop again? He's like, you and I, he goes, I got my retail store and I'm thinking about a retread shop. And you know, you and I will, we'll do that. I'm like, I had nothing else going on. I'm unemployed. I'm like, fuck it. Let's do it. You know? So, uh, I'm making $700 a week, and yet I'm winning and losing tens of thousands of dollars.