Commentator 1
speaker
354 appearances
48 recordings
2 series
first heard Dec 2024
last heard May 2025
Commentator 1’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
20.
10,000 more days? That is 27 years. I can't still be talking about Trump when I'm in my late 40s. It's not that funny. But while cable news debated, Trump himself celebrated the big 100 by inviting ABC News reporter Terry Moran to the White House for an interview. And Trump kicked things off by asking the same thing every kid does when a guest comes to the house. Want to see my room?
Modernization? This looks like my great-grandmother decorated the mantelpiece with her great-grandmother's ashes. And I know that beautification is in the eye of the beholdification, but we can all agree that the foam core Gulf of America map is pulling focus, right? Is the Gulf of America having a bridal shower in the banquet room with a Hilton Garden Inn? Because if it's not, get it out of here.
But okay, you know what, show me a few more things in your room and then I gotta go join the grown-ups.
Trump is always in the, I forgot to do the reading mode. Man, that Monroe Doctrine, so important. My favorite part? Probably the doctrine. And doctrine, as we all know, is a female doctor. But you know what? We can't expect Trump to know anything about a president whose picture he put up. It's not fair. So let's give him something easier. Donald, tell us what the Declaration of Independence is.
And remember, this is the document in which we declared independence.
Look at Terry Moran's face. He looks like a teacher about to call the school psychologist. This is a great drawing. Stay right here. But of course he'd make that face. Trump said that the Declaration of Independence meant unity. Unity is the opposite of independence. How did Trump find the one time that unity and love is the wrong answer?
What makes this even more sad is that the Declaration of Independence is basically the colonies filing for divorce. It's the one thing Trump should absolutely recognize. And all of that was supposed to be the softball part of the interview. It wasn't until Moran pulled up his serious chair that the questions got hard.
That's what Trump said? Trump actually said that? Could we just check the tape on that?
1,047.
Oh, yeah, my bad. I misremembered. But the wildest part of the interview by far was when it turned to Trump's deportation of Kilmar Garcia, who Trump says doesn't need due process because anyone can tell that Garcia is in the gang MS-13 just by looking at his tattoos.
OK, let me just explain what's going on here. Garcia has tattoos on his hand and someone labeled a photo of them trying to prove that they're actually a code. The problem is Trump thinks that the labels are part of the tattoo and he is very, very insistent on it.
Now I understand why he's so proud of that Gulf of America poster. He thinks Gulf of America is actually written on top of the water. Makes sense. And what is so crazy is that Terry Moran kept trying to change topics, but Trump wouldn't let him. I have never seen an interview where a reporter catches a politician in a gotcha, and the politician is the one who says, stop trying to move on.
I am not done embarrassing myself. But I will hand it to Terry Moran. He held his ground to the point where it actually wore Trump out. And that's when we saw a moment of vulnerability from Trump.
Why don't you just say I'm right? Up is down, left is right, Santa's real. And that is Trump in a nutshell. I can't prove the insane things I believe, so just go along with them. Don't believe your eyes, believe the Photoshop. But I, I for one, will not believe the Photoshop, okay? I will go into the rest of the term with my eyes wide open, staring and watching, oh God, no, no!
Oh, my eyes, my beautificated eyes! Oh, make it go away. When we come back, the truth about Stephen Miller. Welcome back to The Daily Show. One of the defining policies of President Trump's first 100 days has been his, let's say, enthusiastic deportation effort. We all know that the architect of that policy is his top aide, Stephen Miller. But how did Miller get such power?
Let's find out in a brand new Daily Showography.
America is for Americans and Americans only.
Mass deportations. Chaos and confusion. People detained and families separated. A toddler and U.S.
We do nothing for American holidays, but everything for Mexican holidays. Condoms are available to students grades 9 through 12. We have a club on campus that will gladly help foster their homosexuality. Refuse to say the Pledge of Allegiance in classrooms. We invited a Muslim leader to the school to explain the splendor of Islam. Osama bin Laden would feel very welcome at Salman, the high school.
Showing 41–60 of 354 · page 3 of 18
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