Connell Barrett

It comes off as women read it as creepy.

It's not that you're being creepy.

It's just that it feels there's something off-putting about a guy who doesn't believe in himself enough to just look the cute barista in the eye and say, hey, by the way, I'm Connell.

What's your name?

Nice to meet you.

I was curious, would you like to go on a date with me sometime?

Maybe get coffee when you're not working.

It'd be nice to get to know you.

I just think you're really charming.

Something like that would have been great.

I don't know if it would have worked or not, but avoidance, a half-hearted, non-committed approach is pretty much a guarantee of a rejection.

And if you want to go back and check out an episode I talked about, this framework I came up with called the Six Icks.

all the ways that a man can be creepy to a woman they all fall into one of six categories there's six ways to give women the ick and one of the most common ways to give women the ick that you might have committed in your past i know i did is half-hearted attempt at a move you know you tentatively go in for the kiss but then you kiss her cheek or you

want to hold her hand, but you just sort of touch her hand with one finger, which is weird.

Or you want to approach, but instead of approaching, you just stand near her and stare at her.

Those half-hearted moves read as creepy and off-putting to women.

That doesn't mean you're creepy.

It means your energy is being perceived that way.

And this Starbucks woman

Note, mash note, I heart you note is an example of me, you know, it's all about commitment, right?