Connell Barrett

We just went to sleep.

I remember feeling disappointed because I was so focused on me and Hey, must close the deal.

Pretty 20 something woman in my apartment got to close that deal.

Right.

That's what my old coaches used to say, some of them.

Basically, it was all about sex.

And so I feel like if I could go back and do it over again, sure, I'd make one or two moves.

But all I would do is think, how can I make Katie feel comfortable while being me?

That's my biggest lesson is I'm not even going to try.

I'm not going to.

Sure, I'll make a move or two.

She came over with a bottle of wine.

Maybe she wants a fun, sexy night.

But maybe she just wanted to talk first.

Maybe she wanted to really connect as people.

I don't know.

And I never really gave us the space to make that happen.

So that would be an example of me definitely coming off as too sex-focused, too focused on what's in it for me, and trying to get out of this what I want.

That's a big lesson.

One of the six icks, those six things that, those six categories of creepy behavior in the minds of women, one of them is just being focused on what you get, regardless of what she gets.