Dan Savage

Not our girl Nancy, not Savage Lovecast producer Nancy Hartunian, but Nancy, the straight male cross-dresser who heard us ask if there were any straight male cross-dressers out there in our audience who would want to come on the show and talk about... Cross-dressing, which you hear a lot less about these days than you used to.

Tons of your great sex questions and a whole bonus Nancy coming up for you today on the Savage Lovecast. Let's get to that first question right now. This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep, the makers of my mattress and your next mattress. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash savage.

Tons of your great sex questions and a whole bonus Nancy coming up for you today on the Savage Lovecast. Let's get to that first question right now. This episode is brought to you by Helix Sleep, the makers of my mattress and your next mattress. Right now, Helix is offering 25% off all mattress orders and two free pillows for our listeners. Go to helixsleep.com slash savage.

This is their best offer yet. It won't last long. Go get your new mattress. With Helix, better sleep starts now. This episode is sponsored by HIMSS. Affordable access to ED treatment all online. Start your free online visit today at himss.com slash savage.

This is their best offer yet. It won't last long. Go get your new mattress. With Helix, better sleep starts now. This episode is sponsored by HIMSS. Affordable access to ED treatment all online. Start your free online visit today at himss.com slash savage.

So the problem here isn't that you're out at a bar having drinks with a higher up at the place where you work and that the conversation is getting flirty and explicit. That is not the problem that you asked me to address. It is a problem that a lot of people out there listening are probably flagging right now.

So the problem here isn't that you're out at a bar having drinks with a higher up at the place where you work and that the conversation is getting flirty and explicit. That is not the problem that you asked me to address. It is a problem that a lot of people out there listening are probably flagging right now.

What kind of a workplace is this if the higher ups are going out with the underlings and talking about... their sexual orientations and their genital preferences and getting tipsy and flirty with employees. You didn't ask me to address that. I sometimes think people put too much emphasis on that as a problem. A lot of people do meet people that they wind up fucking at work.

What kind of a workplace is this if the higher ups are going out with the underlings and talking about... their sexual orientations and their genital preferences and getting tipsy and flirty with employees. You didn't ask me to address that. I sometimes think people put too much emphasis on that as a problem. A lot of people do meet people that they wind up fucking at work.

And so long as someone isn't exploiting their power over you and they're consciously exploiting leaning out of their power over you. And if your workplace has a go to your higher, higher ups and disclose any romantic connection policy, you're doing that. I don't have a problem with people fucking people that they met at work.

And so long as someone isn't exploiting their power over you and they're consciously exploiting leaning out of their power over you. And if your workplace has a go to your higher, higher ups and disclose any romantic connection policy, you're doing that. I don't have a problem with people fucking people that they met at work.

We live in a world where there are a lot of people who aren't fucking at all anymore right now because the dating apps are a fucking nightmare and don't work for them. And people are bowling alone to use that horrible phrase and not going out and not getting laid. Um, And I feel like as problematic as workplace romances and bromances can be, I don't want to close that down.

We live in a world where there are a lot of people who aren't fucking at all anymore right now because the dating apps are a fucking nightmare and don't work for them. And people are bowling alone to use that horrible phrase and not going out and not getting laid. Um, And I feel like as problematic as workplace romances and bromances can be, I don't want to close that down.

I don't want to make that so taboo. No one ever... Fuck somebody that isn't a lateral fuck on the power chart that they met through work. Anyway, what do you do? Well, my feeling, if you're out to 20%, you estimate, of your coworkers about being trans and out to a few of your managers about being trans... And you didn't swear them to secrecy when you came out to them as trans.

I don't want to make that so taboo. No one ever... Fuck somebody that isn't a lateral fuck on the power chart that they met through work. Anyway, what do you do? Well, my feeling, if you're out to 20%, you estimate, of your coworkers about being trans and out to a few of your managers about being trans... And you didn't swear them to secrecy when you came out to them as trans.

And they aren't the kind of hand-wringing allies who are hyper-conscious of it not being their news to share. Coming out to a fifth of people in your graduating class, coming out to a fifth of people at work, coming out to a fifth of your family typically means, in pretty short order, that...

And they aren't the kind of hand-wringing allies who are hyper-conscious of it not being their news to share. Coming out to a fifth of people in your graduating class, coming out to a fifth of people at work, coming out to a fifth of your family typically means, in pretty short order, that...

the other 80% of your coworkers, classmates, family, whatever it is, find out because word does indeed spread. So my money's on this guy was flirting with you may know you're trans likely knows you're trans. And this was going where you thought it was going. I'm gay until the dick comes out. There's more than one way to interpret that.

the other 80% of your coworkers, classmates, family, whatever it is, find out because word does indeed spread. So my money's on this guy was flirting with you may know you're trans likely knows you're trans. And this was going where you thought it was going. I'm gay until the dick comes out. There's more than one way to interpret that.

I'm gay until my dick comes out and then I kind of lose it when I'm with a dude, trans or cis, or I'm gay so long as I'm getting blown by a guy who is keeping, if he has a dick, his dick in his pants or bending over for me, but doesn't expect me to bend over for him. I don't want to touch a dick. That's not gay that would pass the gay muster in my gay house, but I guess that's gay for him.