Dan Savage

I think the risk here is some entanglement, somebody insinuating themselves into your life, not your real life, but kind of into your online life.

I think the risk here is some entanglement, somebody insinuating themselves into your life, not your real life, but kind of into your online life.

And you winding up feeling like you owe them something or they attempt to leverage the money you've given into convincing you you owe them something else, something more, something you're not comfortable sharing with them like pics or paying a lot of attention to them or swapping a lot of text messages with them about each and every cash payment that they send you.

And you winding up feeling like you owe them something or they attempt to leverage the money you've given into convincing you you owe them something else, something more, something you're not comfortable sharing with them like pics or paying a lot of attention to them or swapping a lot of text messages with them about each and every cash payment that they send you.

Be clear with any guy who you're going to let be your pay pig what the exchange there is. Because it is an exchange. There's goods and services. What are they seeking out? What kind of service do they want from you? There are some people out there who are fin subs who just enjoy the rush of sending money to someone who pays no attention to them at all.

Be clear with any guy who you're going to let be your pay pig what the exchange there is. Because it is an exchange. There's goods and services. What are they seeking out? What kind of service do they want from you? There are some people out there who are fin subs who just enjoy the rush of sending money to someone who pays no attention to them at all.

Most fin subs want some attention to be paid to them, some form of attention. Maybe they want to get a couple of photos. Maybe they want to get, some abusive or degrading text messages from you, or maybe they just want the occasional thank you and the occasional exchange of mild pleasantries with this tinge of financial submission.

Most fin subs want some attention to be paid to them, some form of attention. Maybe they want to get a couple of photos. Maybe they want to get, some abusive or degrading text messages from you, or maybe they just want the occasional thank you and the occasional exchange of mild pleasantries with this tinge of financial submission.

There's lots of different ways Fin subs get off and function online, and that's where you need to think about what you're comfortable with and how susceptible you might be to guilt trips and I think is really what you need to focus on as you assess your comfort with the risks here.

There's lots of different ways Fin subs get off and function online, and that's where you need to think about what you're comfortable with and how susceptible you might be to guilt trips and I think is really what you need to focus on as you assess your comfort with the risks here.

Because I think that's the real risk, that you will wind up feeling pressured or feeling obligated to do for these men, in exchange for these contributions, things that when you first agreed to accept them, you weren't down with or hadn't even thought of. All right, time for listener feedback.

Because I think that's the real risk, that you will wind up feeling pressured or feeling obligated to do for these men, in exchange for these contributions, things that when you first agreed to accept them, you weren't down with or hadn't even thought of. All right, time for listener feedback.

First up, some of the comments left on last week's show in the very lively comment threads at savage.love. Says Lee Silva, I felt so angry listening to the woman talking about lube on your last show. I have needed lube every time. I've had sex since my first child was born. when I was 23. I just don't create enough lubrication myself for clitoral stimulation, which is what I need to orgasm.

First up, some of the comments left on last week's show in the very lively comment threads at savage.love. Says Lee Silva, I felt so angry listening to the woman talking about lube on your last show. I have needed lube every time. I've had sex since my first child was born. when I was 23. I just don't create enough lubrication myself for clitoral stimulation, which is what I need to orgasm.

There is nothing wrong with lube. I am definitely not nervous or scared of having sex. We do a ton of foreplay. My husband and I have absolutely amazing sex. Stop stigmatizing lube, caller. There's nothing wrong with it. Says in Contempo about the same call, lube, lube, lube, caller. should keep in mind that sometimes mental arousal doesn't correspond with physical arousal, especially with women.

There is nothing wrong with lube. I am definitely not nervous or scared of having sex. We do a ton of foreplay. My husband and I have absolutely amazing sex. Stop stigmatizing lube, caller. There's nothing wrong with it. Says in Contempo about the same call, lube, lube, lube, caller. should keep in mind that sometimes mental arousal doesn't correspond with physical arousal, especially with women.

I can be wet and not mentally aroused. I can be horny as balls and still not wet. Lube is necessary for normal, healthy vagina-havers who want sex but their bodies haven't caught up to the fact. It's called arousal non-concordance.

I can be wet and not mentally aroused. I can be horny as balls and still not wet. Lube is necessary for normal, healthy vagina-havers who want sex but their bodies haven't caught up to the fact. It's called arousal non-concordance.

Says Beatrice, for the caller who's struggling with premature ejaculation during hookups but not with his long-term partner, as well as the SSRIs taken daily, as Dan mentioned, there are also short-acting SSRIs you can take on demand. So it's worth talking to your doctor about.

Says Beatrice, for the caller who's struggling with premature ejaculation during hookups but not with his long-term partner, as well as the SSRIs taken daily, as Dan mentioned, there are also short-acting SSRIs you can take on demand. So it's worth talking to your doctor about.