Dee Selman

Yeah.

100% well let's chat about that mismatch because this was huge in our DMs we asked you have you ever had a mismatch in PDA with a partner 73% of you said yes that's a big number it's massive yeah so you and your partner aren't meeting eye to eye when it comes with like how much you are both doing public displays of affection have you ever

I have, my first boyfriend was like so affectionate in private and like really, really like cutesy and like, you know how you get when you are like in love and it's like real baby, blah, blah, blah, like cutie, huggy, whatever.

But then in public he was like,

so chill and cool and like barely showed affection that would piss me off so bad and so yeah it was a bit like whiplash because it was like why i didn't understand like why you wouldn't just be like if someone consistently isn't that physical like very good at physical touch then sure but to be like so physical touchy and then as soon as you're in public to then like not really do that

I find that hard because I'm like what is it about the public display?

Like do you want to not seem like you're in a relationship?

Like do you want to come across as single?

Like what's the signals that you're trying to send out?

What's the reason why people aren't doing PDA?

100%.

Well, let's hear from you and get some voice memos.

So Jeff sent us this voice memo about PDA.

Yeah, but maybe the timing coincided with her just not doing it in front of anyone anymore.

so she left him and they broke up that's crazy isn't it like it can definitely be a deal breaker for people well it makes you feel so shit when you see a couple expressing their love so freely and they're so happy and they like don't they're so in love they don't care who sees yeah like that's really hard to see and can trigger like so much anxiety around your relationship if you don't have that

And I actually had a friend say this to me once, like when we were all hanging out and like my partner and I were like just like hugging and kissing and like just like Jess said, like nothing over the top.

But she was like, oh, my partner would never do that to me.

And it made her feel really insecure about her relationship and made her kind of second guess everything.

And it's such a hard one because I'm like, you deserve what you want, right?

Like you deserve to have the relationship you want to have.