Dhru Purohit

that then your body kind of thinks, oh, this is hot, right?

I want this.

This feels good.

Suddenly you are in the mood for sex.

And what we know, again, is that when couples have this sex where they start out like, am I in the mood?

Well, I know it's important.

I know sex is healthy for me.

I know sex is important for our relationship.

So I'm going to really give this a try and really

see if we can make, you know, have a good, satisfying sexual experience, that afterwards, it's just as incredible and orgasmic as the sex where maybe they started out thinking, oh, I want to have sex tonight.

I'm really, you know, driven by desire.

And I think that can be an especially helpful message for many women who feel like, you know, I have to kind of just be lying next to my partner and it's not, you know, I'm not going to, if I'm not turned on right away, it means I don't want it.

That's not necessarily true, right?

Sometimes we have to kind of get into the mood and start physically touching our partner before that subjective sense of, oh, I really want this kicks in.

Yeah, so we, again, it goes back to this idea that we assume that first of all, if we lose that sense of attraction to our partner, that there's something wrong in the relationship, right?

And this is why a lot of people will kind of panic after that initial honeymoon stage is over in a relationship where,

You don't want to tear their clothes off every time they walk into the room.

And there can be times in the relationship even further down the road from that when you're maybe not feeling that hot for your partner all the time.

And so there are a couple of different ways that we need to address that.

And the first is to look at the actual sex that you're having.