Dr. Becky Kennedy

So I feel like not taking the bait is a very important parenting tool. But I think those moments with our kids to talk about emotions and to talk about our own, especially when it comes to struggle, right? Yeah. One of the things I think a lot about, I try to be intentional with my kids, especially when they're younger. I just think kids are flooded by their parents' capability.

And it is so hard to learn in environments where someone's capability is so far beyond your own. I'm not a good cook, but if I was really learning to cook, I would want to learn from someone from here or there, you know, burnt some garlic or messed up the broccoli. And then it was like, okay, well, I guess I could do this next time. Okay.

And it is so hard to learn in environments where someone's capability is so far beyond your own. I'm not a good cook, but if I was really learning to cook, I would want to learn from someone from here or there, you know, burnt some garlic or messed up the broccoli. And then it was like, okay, well, I guess I could do this next time. Okay.

And it is so hard to learn in environments where someone's capability is so far beyond your own. I'm not a good cook, but if I was really learning to cook, I would want to learn from someone from here or there, you know, burnt some garlic or messed up the broccoli. And then it was like, okay, well, I guess I could do this next time. Okay.

But if I'm learning to cook from someone who is whatever celebrity chef, that person's like way too far from me. And I almost feel shame. So I think about this with our kids and how this relates to emotions, where when your kids are younger, especially if you just think about the first 10 minutes of their day,

But if I'm learning to cook from someone who is whatever celebrity chef, that person's like way too far from me. And I almost feel shame. So I think about this with our kids and how this relates to emotions, where when your kids are younger, especially if you just think about the first 10 minutes of their day,

But if I'm learning to cook from someone who is whatever celebrity chef, that person's like way too far from me. And I almost feel shame. So I think about this with our kids and how this relates to emotions, where when your kids are younger, especially if you just think about the first 10 minutes of their day,

Like they're trying to figure out maybe how to brush their teeth, how to go to the bathroom, how to turn on the sink, how to wash their hands. They always put their shirt on the wrong way. They can't get on their socks. There's so many things. And you come out dressed perfectly. And then I can't get on my socks. And you go like this. Okay, one, two.

Like they're trying to figure out maybe how to brush their teeth, how to go to the bathroom, how to turn on the sink, how to wash their hands. They always put their shirt on the wrong way. They can't get on their socks. There's so many things. And you come out dressed perfectly. And then I can't get on my socks. And you go like this. Okay, one, two.

Like they're trying to figure out maybe how to brush their teeth, how to go to the bathroom, how to turn on the sink, how to wash their hands. They always put their shirt on the wrong way. They can't get on their socks. There's so many things. And you come out dressed perfectly. And then I can't get on my socks. And you go like this. Okay, one, two.

And kind of in those moments, I always think that I'm just kind of saying to my kid, I can do everything easily. And they don't know our history. They don't know. We struggled to put on socks for five years too. I put on my shirt backward, you know, until college. They don't know that.

And kind of in those moments, I always think that I'm just kind of saying to my kid, I can do everything easily. And they don't know our history. They don't know. We struggled to put on socks for five years too. I put on my shirt backward, you know, until college. They don't know that.

And kind of in those moments, I always think that I'm just kind of saying to my kid, I can do everything easily. And they don't know our history. They don't know. We struggled to put on socks for five years too. I put on my shirt backward, you know, until college. They don't know that.

And so I think, again, in these calm moments, you have this opportunity to say something like, I cannot finish this crossword puzzle. Or like, I love New York Times games, right? And it's so fun with my kids now that they're older. But my connections was really hard today. I just, I really struggled with it. And I was like, oh, I can't do it. I can't do it. And then I took a deep breath and I...

And so I think, again, in these calm moments, you have this opportunity to say something like, I cannot finish this crossword puzzle. Or like, I love New York Times games, right? And it's so fun with my kids now that they're older. But my connections was really hard today. I just, I really struggled with it. And I was like, oh, I can't do it. I can't do it. And then I took a deep breath and I...

And so I think, again, in these calm moments, you have this opportunity to say something like, I cannot finish this crossword puzzle. Or like, I love New York Times games, right? And it's so fun with my kids now that they're older. But my connections was really hard today. I just, I really struggled with it. And I was like, oh, I can't do it. I can't do it. And then I took a deep breath and I...

tried it a little more, and maybe I said, and I did it, or I didn't do it, whatever it is. And it gives my kid, first of all, it gives my kid an opportunity to just notice that I struggle too. It gives my kid, again, kind of an arc and a story of, oh, someone I admire so much. Every kid admires their parents. They've had hard times. They still have hard times. They work through things.

tried it a little more, and maybe I said, and I did it, or I didn't do it, whatever it is. And it gives my kid, first of all, it gives my kid an opportunity to just notice that I struggle too. It gives my kid, again, kind of an arc and a story of, oh, someone I admire so much. Every kid admires their parents. They've had hard times. They still have hard times. They work through things.

tried it a little more, and maybe I said, and I did it, or I didn't do it, whatever it is. And it gives my kid, first of all, it gives my kid an opportunity to just notice that I struggle too. It gives my kid, again, kind of an arc and a story of, oh, someone I admire so much. Every kid admires their parents. They've had hard times. They still have hard times. They work through things.

They burn garlic. They can kind of talk themselves through it. That is such a more powerful kind of lesson in emotion regulation than teaching your kid kind of directly.