Dr. Caroline Fleck

Yeah.

It is.

It is.

It is.

Yeah. Well, so a negative attention is positive attention feels really good. But on that spectrum, I would say acceptance. Now, that's really yummy. Right. So if we were to kind of put these things on a scale because praise and all that, that's a judgment. But it also is contingent upon you meeting or exceeding someone's expectations. All right.

Yeah. Well, so a negative attention is positive attention feels really good. But on that spectrum, I would say acceptance. Now, that's really yummy. Right. So if we were to kind of put these things on a scale because praise and all that, that's a judgment. But it also is contingent upon you meeting or exceeding someone's expectations. All right.

Yeah. Well, so a negative attention is positive attention feels really good. But on that spectrum, I would say acceptance. Now, that's really yummy. Right. So if we were to kind of put these things on a scale because praise and all that, that's a judgment. But it also is contingent upon you meeting or exceeding someone's expectations. All right.

So you can get really into like facade making, especially with like social media. You're filtering this. You're filtering that. You're getting all this praise. But it's somewhat empty because it's not you. that the person truly quote unquote likes or appreciates or whatever. It's this version of you that you've created that's being reinforced.

So you can get really into like facade making, especially with like social media. You're filtering this. You're filtering that. You're getting all this praise. But it's somewhat empty because it's not you. that the person truly quote unquote likes or appreciates or whatever. It's this version of you that you've created that's being reinforced.

So you can get really into like facade making, especially with like social media. You're filtering this. You're filtering that. You're getting all this praise. But it's somewhat empty because it's not you. that the person truly quote unquote likes or appreciates or whatever. It's this version of you that you've created that's being reinforced.

And then you're reinforced for distorting more and more. And it's just there's this hollowness. There's this emptiness to that type of connection because it's not you that's accepted. It's not you that's appreciated. It's the version you've created.

And then you're reinforced for distorting more and more. And it's just there's this hollowness. There's this emptiness to that type of connection because it's not you that's accepted. It's not you that's appreciated. It's the version you've created.

And then you're reinforced for distorting more and more. And it's just there's this hollowness. There's this emptiness to that type of connection because it's not you that's accepted. It's not you that's appreciated. It's the version you've created.

It is for all of the above. So there's a really interesting kind of backstory to validation, which is that it came out of a treatment, at least the skills that I teach. They were developed in a treatment for borderline personality disorder, which is a pretty severe psychological disorder. And up until the 90s, we had no treatment for this population.

It is for all of the above. So there's a really interesting kind of backstory to validation, which is that it came out of a treatment, at least the skills that I teach. They were developed in a treatment for borderline personality disorder, which is a pretty severe psychological disorder. And up until the 90s, we had no treatment for this population.

It is for all of the above. So there's a really interesting kind of backstory to validation, which is that it came out of a treatment, at least the skills that I teach. They were developed in a treatment for borderline personality disorder, which is a pretty severe psychological disorder. And up until the 90s, we had no treatment for this population.

So folks with BPD are highly stigmatized in the mental health field, and I think just in popular culture, in part because some of their external behavior can look and feel very aversive. So folks who are self-harming, folks who are what many would consider manipulative to try and get their needs met. And there's all of this externalizing behavior

So folks with BPD are highly stigmatized in the mental health field, and I think just in popular culture, in part because some of their external behavior can look and feel very aversive. So folks who are self-harming, folks who are what many would consider manipulative to try and get their needs met. And there's all of this externalizing behavior

So folks with BPD are highly stigmatized in the mental health field, and I think just in popular culture, in part because some of their external behavior can look and feel very aversive. So folks who are self-harming, folks who are what many would consider manipulative to try and get their needs met. And there's all of this externalizing behavior

This person kind of oscillates between loving and hating you. And there's these extremes at either end. And it can make for, as a therapist, a very difficult, quote unquote, patient.