Dr. David Burns

No, it's okay to be alone as long as you're miserable. But if you're happy being alone, you're some kind of a sociopath.

No, it's okay to be alone as long as you're miserable. But if you're happy being alone, you're some kind of a sociopath.

Well, you're the sociopath, not us. We love being together. We're people people. People, please, or people people. People lover. People lovers, yes. We love each other. But we hate you because you enjoy being alone.

Well, you're the sociopath, not us. We love being together. We're people people. People, please, or people people. People lover. People lovers, yes. We love each other. But we hate you because you enjoy being alone.

Yes. And I too feel rejected and very hurt right now. And I'm going to be miserable all day because of you. Wow. That's giving me a lot of power over you.

Yes. And I too feel rejected and very hurt right now. And I'm going to be miserable all day because of you. Wow. That's giving me a lot of power over you.

I'd love to hear more about that. I refuse to talk about it. I don't want to have anything to do with you. Okay. Well, this is kind of ridiculous, but this is the claim, right? Yeah. Who's winning, Rhonda?

I'd love to hear more about that. I refuse to talk about it. I don't want to have anything to do with you. Okay. Well, this is kind of ridiculous, but this is the claim, right? Yeah. Who's winning, Rhonda?

Big or small? Big. Big or huge?

Big or small? Big. Big or huge?

Yeah, I think so, too. Yeah. Absolutely.

Yeah, I think so, too. Yeah. Absolutely.

Yeah, absolutely. All right. Now, what are we going to do here for John from Ireland today?

Yeah, absolutely. All right. Now, what are we going to do here for John from Ireland today?

Okay. Well, there's an awful lot here, but a lot more writing if you read the show notes. And you guys, once again, share your thoughts, and then I'll see if I can add a little bit to it. He has this example, and he sent me, again, emails with like 30 should statements in a row. The only one in the show notes is I should have plans on a Saturday, which he believes 99%.

Okay. Well, there's an awful lot here, but a lot more writing if you read the show notes. And you guys, once again, share your thoughts, and then I'll see if I can add a little bit to it. He has this example, and he sent me, again, emails with like 30 should statements in a row. The only one in the show notes is I should have plans on a Saturday, which he believes 99%.

And he says the distortions there are should, emotional reasoning, self-blame, mental filter, and discounting the positive. And then he does a cost-benefit analysis. What are the benefits of that thought? It lets me know when I'm not performing to the standards I set for myself. It shows me my passion and goal in life for doing fun and exciting things and motivates me, you know.

And he says the distortions there are should, emotional reasoning, self-blame, mental filter, and discounting the positive. And then he does a cost-benefit analysis. What are the benefits of that thought? It lets me know when I'm not performing to the standards I set for myself. It shows me my passion and goal in life for doing fun and exciting things and motivates me, you know.

And then the cost is that emotionally when I should like on myself, I beat up on myself relentlessly and this makes me feel depressed, anxious and lowers my self-esteem and reinforces my perfectionistic beliefs and other negative costs of hitting yourself with should statements. And then he says the benefits are 40 and the costs are 60. So I'll let you guys dive into this.

And then the cost is that emotionally when I should like on myself, I beat up on myself relentlessly and this makes me feel depressed, anxious and lowers my self-esteem and reinforces my perfectionistic beliefs and other negative costs of hitting yourself with should statements. And then he says the benefits are 40 and the costs are 60. So I'll let you guys dive into this.