Dr. David Burns

And Albert Ellis called them irrational beliefs, which is also somewhat misleading because it implies that they're bad or they're going to defeat you or they're kind of irrational. The way I look at a self-defeating belief, it's more like a two-edged sword. It actually has a lot of benefits for you as well as a price to pay.

The first thing is to do a cost-benefit analysis and put a line down the middle of a piece of paper and put the advantages on the left and the disadvantages on the right. And it wouldn't be the advantages and disadvantages of achievement. That means you didn't get the point.

The first thing is to do a cost-benefit analysis and put a line down the middle of a piece of paper and put the advantages on the left and the disadvantages on the right. And it wouldn't be the advantages and disadvantages of achievement. That means you didn't get the point.

It's the advantages and disadvantages of basing your happiness and feelings of worthwhileness on your achievements or your accomplishments. And there are a lot of advantages. When you accomplish something great, you'll feel terrific. That's certainly an advantage. And it'll motivate you to work hard and accomplish more and maybe make more money. That's certainly a positive.

It's the advantages and disadvantages of basing your happiness and feelings of worthwhileness on your achievements or your accomplishments. And there are a lot of advantages. When you accomplish something great, you'll feel terrific. That's certainly an advantage. And it'll motivate you to work hard and accomplish more and maybe make more money. That's certainly a positive.

And then other people may admire you because you're so hardworking and industrious. And because you have high values, you may end up doing more high-quality work, and on and on. And so those are very real advantages. And then in the right-hand column, you can list the disadvantages. When I fail, I'll fall apart.

And then other people may admire you because you're so hardworking and industrious. And because you have high values, you may end up doing more high-quality work, and on and on. And so those are very real advantages. And then in the right-hand column, you can list the disadvantages. When I fail, I'll fall apart.

When I'm worried about failure, I'll be struggling with anxiety and maybe performance anxiety. And And, you know, I may be afraid to take on new challenges for fear of not performing perfectly or failing. And when I fail, I may view it as some kind of emotional defeat rather than an opportunity to learn from the failure. What can this tell me? What specific errors did I make? And so forth.

When I'm worried about failure, I'll be struggling with anxiety and maybe performance anxiety. And And, you know, I may be afraid to take on new challenges for fear of not performing perfectly or failing. And when I fail, I may view it as some kind of emotional defeat rather than an opportunity to learn from the failure. What can this tell me? What specific errors did I make? And so forth.

And so you'll find tremendous numbers of advantages and disadvantages in any self-defeating belief. And then you can weigh them on a 100-point scale, which put two numbers at the bottom of the columns. On my cost-benefit analysis, there's a little graph. You know, kind of like a barbell or a dumbbell or something, a line with two circles at the end.

And so you'll find tremendous numbers of advantages and disadvantages in any self-defeating belief. And then you can weigh them on a 100-point scale, which put two numbers at the bottom of the columns. On my cost-benefit analysis, there's a little graph. You know, kind of like a barbell or a dumbbell or something, a line with two circles at the end.

And you put the, like, if the advantages seem greater, you might put 65, 35 in the circles. If it's a wash, you might put 50, 50 in the circles. And if the disadvantages are greater, you might put, like, 20 in the advantages circle and 80 in the disadvantages circle. And then you only work to change that self-defeating belief if the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.

And you put the, like, if the advantages seem greater, you might put 65, 35 in the circles. If it's a wash, you might put 50, 50 in the circles. And if the disadvantages are greater, you might put, like, 20 in the advantages circle and 80 in the disadvantages circle. And then you only work to change that self-defeating belief if the disadvantages outweigh the advantages.

If the advantages are greater, you don't need to change it. It's working for you. If it's 50-50, I'd say let's not work on it because it takes a lot of work and you're kind of on the fence. And maybe you can come back on another occasion if you change your mind and decide that this thing isn't working for you.

If the advantages are greater, you don't need to change it. It's working for you. If it's 50-50, I'd say let's not work on it because it takes a lot of work and you're kind of on the fence. And maybe you can come back on another occasion if you change your mind and decide that this thing isn't working for you.

But if you find that the disadvantages are greater, then you can use techniques like the semantic technique, positive reframing, the experimental technique, the feared fantasy, as well as any of the more than 100 techniques like be specific is a great technique for self-defeating beliefs. But I'll just tell you how one more of these techniques works would be the semantic technique.

But if you find that the disadvantages are greater, then you can use techniques like the semantic technique, positive reframing, the experimental technique, the feared fantasy, as well as any of the more than 100 techniques like be specific is a great technique for self-defeating beliefs. But I'll just tell you how one more of these techniques works would be the semantic technique.

If you don't decide that it's not to your advantage to base your self-esteem and worthwhileness on your achievements or accomplishments, you could say you can rewrite it in some way that makes sense to you, a way that will eliminate all of the disadvantages and maintain all of the advantages.

If you don't decide that it's not to your advantage to base your self-esteem and worthwhileness on your achievements or accomplishments, you could say you can rewrite it in some way that makes sense to you, a way that will eliminate all of the disadvantages and maintain all of the advantages.

Like you might say, I love working hard and creating things, and it's a lot of fun to come up with something. Say if I'm writing something or whatever, your area of achievement might be carpentry or painting or whatever. But if I come up with something really terrific that people love, It doesn't make me any better than any other person.