Dr. David Burns

I have two other small contributions. I think kids will always tell you how they're feeling if you ask in a specific way. Like if they understand 0 to 100 or 0 to 10, you could just say you look like you might be feeling a little sad or down or unhappy. How unhappy are you feeling on, say, a 0 to 10 scale? Hmm.

And then if they give you like a 6 or an 8 or a 10, that's, you know, how anxious or scared do you feel on a 0 to 10? Do you feel alone or lonely on a 0 to 10? How ashamed do you feel? How inadequate do you feel or inferior? How hurt? How angry? How... How discouraged do you feel?

And then if they give you like a 6 or an 8 or a 10, that's, you know, how anxious or scared do you feel on a 0 to 10? Do you feel alone or lonely on a 0 to 10? How ashamed do you feel? How inadequate do you feel or inferior? How hurt? How angry? How... How discouraged do you feel?

Those are simple words, and kids will tell you, you know, on a zero to ten or a zero to five, just say ten is the most and zero is not at all. They'll usually tell you what their feelings are. Well, I guess you would have more knowledge of that than I would, Manuel, because you're working with kids constantly, but that is one thing.

Those are simple words, and kids will tell you, you know, on a zero to ten or a zero to five, just say ten is the most and zero is not at all. They'll usually tell you what their feelings are. Well, I guess you would have more knowledge of that than I would, Manuel, because you're working with kids constantly, but that is one thing.

And then another thing that I said that could be misinterpreted by listeners to the show is, When I'm talking about how to change the internal dialogue in the child's head, I'm talking about techniques that a good therapist can use. But the parent's role would be to empathize and provide warmth and support, like the podcast we did on how to help and how not to help.

And then another thing that I said that could be misinterpreted by listeners to the show is, When I'm talking about how to change the internal dialogue in the child's head, I'm talking about techniques that a good therapist can use. But the parent's role would be to empathize and provide warmth and support, like the podcast we did on how to help and how not to help.

You've got to have an agenda with someone like what you're saying, Matt, with the child before you can teach them these techniques to love and accept yourself. And if the parents just jump in and try to teach those things to the kid, it will backfire.

You've got to have an agenda with someone like what you're saying, Matt, with the child before you can teach them these techniques to love and accept yourself. And if the parents just jump in and try to teach those things to the kid, it will backfire.

Yeah, right. That's nice.

Yeah, right. That's nice.

What did he say?

What did he say?

Oh, cool. Very nice. I love that.

Oh, cool. Very nice. I love that.

Well, the only thing I would add that to me...

Well, the only thing I would add that to me...

seemed incredibly important is before you can respond to a bully outside of you that you have to overcome the bullying that you're doing to yourself and and work on you know whatever it is that triggers your self-hatred so that when someone does bully you or say something mean or belittling that's there is no response there is no self-hatred and you can just then laugh or praise or join in with them

seemed incredibly important is before you can respond to a bully outside of you that you have to overcome the bullying that you're doing to yourself and and work on you know whatever it is that triggers your self-hatred so that when someone does bully you or say something mean or belittling that's there is no response there is no self-hatred and you can just then laugh or praise or join in with them

It's actually fun once you're not buying into it. Yeah, it can be like a game. You know, Rhonda, could I talk to you for a minute?