Dr. David Coleman

And yet even within that, whether he has ADHD or not, you still have to help him manage or manage him in certain situations.

And I think that's where some guidance is probably going to help.

And so but the first step would be to find out if it is ADHD, because if it is ADHD,

attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, you know, then there are other things, perhaps something like medication might also help in terms of the ADHD.

And so I think, you know, what it gives you is some direction with regard to, you know, what's the best intervention and then you're going to move into what you can do to help them.

Oh my goodness, such a challenge for every single parent.

I would suggest to you that you hold off for as long as you possibly can.

There is no benefit to a 12-year-old having a phone, a smartphone.

I think if you are going to give them a smartphone because it's just, you know, the level of pressure is there, the confirmations are all happening and an awful lot of children now are getting a phone for their confirmation that that was the

that was the deadline as far as the child was concerned and parents probably feel that they have to acquiesce in some ways and this is the the struggle i think for parents because there is that peer pressure at this age 12 uh 12 and 13. and so yeah i i mean i think if you are going to give them a phone then you need to set up all of your limits really clearly from the outset so discuss with them um about the phone you know one of the things that you might want to consider

is that you buy the phone but you don't gift it to them and but that they have use of a phone of yours and so that then gives you a little bit more control at this age as well and so that means then that if you feel that they're not using the phone appropriately you can uh take it away from them and you're not taking their phone you're taking your phone back and and so that's one thing to consider the other thing i suppose is just making sure that you set up some of the parental controls that you can through things like google family link and there are other um

different kinds of software out there that will allow you to regulate the amount of time, the particular apps that your child has access to, how long they have access to those apps.

Certainly when it comes to apps like Snapchat, I would strongly recommend that you don't let your 12 year old have Snapchat yet.

I suppose at some point you probably will, but certainly not at the outset.

And then it's all about the constant talking with them and trying to understand so that when it comes to the amount of time that they suddenly start to spend on their phone or the kinds of things that they're using their phone for, that you have an insight into that and you can help them regulate and monitor.

because it's almost impossible to expect a 12-year-old to be able to regulate their time with a smartphone because we know that any app that they're going to be using is designed to try to keep them using that app on that phone.

And so the algorithms that are behind it, the AI that's pushing it, the minds that have developed the AI and the algorithms, they're really smart.

And so kids are essentially helpless when it comes to managing their own time.

So I think it is

really up to us if we're going to give our child a phone age 12 we absolutely have to be there monitoring it and and making sure that we help them regulate their time and and what they're doing and keep it out of the bedroom