Dr. Ellen Langer

Just take care of the moment.

And then the next moment and before you know it, you've had a life lived well.

When we're mindless, we just think we know.

And so we're oblivious to all the ways things could be different from what we know.

So if you're playing a sport and you're taught, this is the way you hold the tennis racket.

For many people, they think that is the way, but who decided?

When I give lectures, sometimes I'll ask, is there a tall man in the audience?

For reasons I don't understand, Mel, there always is.

A six foot five guy.

I ask him to come to the stage.

So here I am at 5'3".

Here he is at 6'5".

We look ridiculous together, right?

I ask him to put his hand up.

He puts his hand up.

His hand is three inches longer than mine.

Then I just raise the question, should we do anything similar, anything the same way, anything physical the same way?

And I don't think so.

Now is the important point, especially for your female listeners.

If he created the rules for how to do this, the more different I am from him, the more important it is for me not to do it exactly that way, for me to change it ever so slightly so that it more meets my own needs, physical being, and so on.