Dr. Ellen Langer

And as soon as you know you don't know, then you sit up and pay attention.

Two, every time we're judgmental, judging somebody else or ourselves, recognize we're being mindless, and there's another way that that behavior can be viewed.

Their behavior that we're putting them down for actually makes sense from their perspective or else they wouldn't do it.

Number three, next time we're stressed, recognize that events don't cause the stress.

Ask yourself, how is this actually a good thing?

Stress requires a prediction.

Predicting something's awful going to happen.

How do you know it's going to happen?

How might it actually turn out into a good thing?

Most important is that when we know we don't know, we sit up and we notice.

All we have to do to teach ourselves that we don't know is take another look at the things we think we do know and ask how it could be otherwise.

How is this thing that seems awful, how might it actually be something good?

How is this job that I hate might actually be one that is nurturing me in some ways, providing some nourishment?

How might I do it differently?

No matter what you're doing, just ask yourself how you might do it differently.

And that if we remember that what is done by people is not handed down from the heavens as to how to do it.

And so you don't need to do it the same.

If you're cooking.

You know, it's guesswork.

Somebody decided, for most things, not everything if you're making a souffle, but for most things, and, you know, you need a cup of sugar, and you don't have a cup of sugar.