Dr. Gabor Maté

So we think we're the personality, I'm this sexually attractive guy, or I'm this aggressive guy, I'm this material guy who's gonna make it in the world.

And so we think that we are a personality.

So it comes from, I'd say, three sources.

One is the conditioning, the other is the fear,

for the pain and thirdly, the identification with the personality.

We think that's who we are and we don't know who would be without it.

All of which is all based on trauma.

I wouldn't even talk about killing.

I mean, in my healing chapters of this book, I talk about, let's make friends with it.

Like for example, I have to, by the way, I have to be honest.

I said that I wouldn't be in this guy's shoes for a minute.

That's not true.

Part of me was envying him.

Even here, I'm 78 and married 53 years, but I read about this guy who slept with all these women.

Why couldn't I be that guy?

I don't want to go there, and I wouldn't.

I've long ago chosen not to.

But there's still something that... Who doesn't want to be wanted that much?

Something with the ego or the desire.

Yeah.