Dr. Harry Barry

But this morning, we're going to really focus on the first, you know, the self-oriented.

Can I just go back, though, because you said there that it's a personality trait, which suggests to me that it's innate, that some people are just like this.

Yes, it's something I'm often asked really is, does this come from environment?

You know what I mean?

Is it created by, say, a high achieving household, et cetera, et cetera?

Yes, I think those factors are there and they're present, but it would be my experience over many, many years that most of the time the pressure comes from within the person themselves.

So it seems to be something

that some people have from a very, very early age.

And it's really important that we identify it and we help them learn techniques to deal with it because it can really affect their whole lives.

That's the message I really want to get across today.

What are the behaviours then that are associated with perfectionism when it's in a sort of a problem area?

In a problem area, we often find that the person gives up more easily a task, which is kind of quite surprising.

But the big one is procrastination.

The renowned procrastinators, they'll keep delaying, delaying, delaying till the very last minute because they're so afraid of failing.

That's the key.

And they often then will avoid taking on challenges or purposely set a lower target for themselves, again, because of fear of failure.

So, you know,

I think it's important that behind perfectionism is the irrational belief that I absolutely must not have any imperfections.

And if I do, I'm a failure.

So really what the person with perfectionism is really worried about, it sounds kind of strange, is they're worried about imperfections.