Dr. James Hollis

Forgive the interruption, but I've often said to individuals, it's not so much what you believe, feel, or do.

It's what it's in service to inside of you.

That's an important distinction.

So I may think I've done a good thing when it's really an old codependence, or it's a way of avoiding conflict, or it's a fear-driven response.

We have to always be asking, but what was that in service to inside of me?

And you may not know at first, but you keep asking the question, it'll start rising to the surface.

You begin to recognize that.

That's how we begin to identify some of those internal drivers that we call the complexes.

Because, again, they're clusters of energy with the power to create a provisional personality.

And many times people are identified with their complex.

That's who I am.

I am what I do.

I am my performance.

Rather than beneath all of this is a human being who is wandering through life, afraid of dying, trying to avoid pain as much as possible, and hoping that someone's going to step in and make it all right.

Right.

Well, of course, of course.

First of all, there's no formula that's applicable to everybody and their life circumstances.

You know, the word psychotherapy literally means from the Greek to listen to or pay attention to the soul.

However you go about doing that is right for you.

It's up to you to figure that out.