Dr. Karl Pillemer

Try it out, a cup of tea and a biscuit if you're having a terrible argument.

So that was one of their key points.

I love that.

Yeah, I think it's a good one.

I think it's a really good one.

Well, you know, like another piece, there's one piece of advice I think that really sums up a little bit too of this whole area, if I could share it.

So sometimes a cliché is way more than a cliché.

So sometimes a saying or an expression has this real power, even though it's been used a lot.

And when I asked older people for their advice for a long marriage—

You can imagine one thing I heard.

I'm sure your listeners can.

Don't go to bed angry.

Yes.

So I really wanted to unpack that.

Like, what did that mean?

Why was that so critical when you were in your 80s and 90s and beyond?

Why was that a piece of advice that you wanted to offer younger couples?

Why was it so important?

And one insight was from long experience, really, if an argument carries over to another day, it's just more of a problem and you should really be dealing with it.

But it also has to do with the sense of the shortness of life, because they realized that any night could be the last night.