Dr. Keith Humphreys

And I always felt that, that when I had to say goodbye, I had been honored by them in that way, the last friend they made.

So I...

I just found it profoundly a moving experience and it took away that fear and then I was able to help other people get free of that fear.

Because when you've been around it for a while and then the family comes in and they're scared,

or maybe some of these doctors are scared to death, you can be the person who says this is what's going on, this is what your mom, your dad, your uncle is going through, here's what's going to happen likely, here's how long he's likely to live, here's what we're doing for him and then that helps them because you are radiating that acceptance that they need to come to which is hard.

So I'm just so glad I did that and I really would recommend that

to anybody who wants to give back to community, but also just come to a place of peace with dying.

The way to do that is to be with the dying, not to run from them.

Yes.

And we can in this society, you know, I've done work in developing countries, you can't not see death everywhere.

People die in the street, literally.

And so there is less, oddly enough, there is more death and less fear than there is in our advanced technological society where death is hidden and denied.

So Americans, I find, are much more terrified of it than people I met in Iraq, for example.

So that's why you really have to make an effort, you know, to get past those norms and those structures if you want to be in companionate connection to people who are dying.

Well, that's a really interesting idea.

I think very broadly speaking a lot of heavy substance use is some desire for

oblivion to get away from unpleasant truths.

And I think one of those is death and suffering.

But I think it's broader than that.

So it could be I just can't be in this PTSD anymore or I can't, you know, I was sexually abused as a child and I just need to stamp out those visions and those memories for an hour, you know, and step outside them.