Dr. Martha Beck

You know, it's the overgiving. It's allowing someone to consume your energy and to get high on it. That is an addiction. I will not let you do it. I will separate from you person to person if you continue in your addictive pattern. Doesn't mean that we won't be together in the great self and that we're all one self and we can all love each other forever.

You know, it's the overgiving. It's allowing someone to consume your energy and to get high on it. That is an addiction. I will not let you do it. I will separate from you person to person if you continue in your addictive pattern. Doesn't mean that we won't be together in the great self and that we're all one self and we can all love each other forever.

But it is not kind to feed someone's addiction to eating your energy. Does that make sense?

But it is not kind to feed someone's addiction to eating your energy. Does that make sense?

But it is not kind to feed someone's addiction to eating your energy. Does that make sense?

It's not. You have to do some tough love.

It's not. You have to do some tough love.

It's not. You have to do some tough love.

Yeah. This is not helping you. And they say, but I want more of you. And you say, no. no, you really don't. You want something false I was creating for you, and it's actually not me. You know, my friends who, why would you leave the church? Now you're lost to us. And I was like, no, I was always a gay non-Mormon.

Yeah. This is not helping you. And they say, but I want more of you. And you say, no. no, you really don't. You want something false I was creating for you, and it's actually not me. You know, my friends who, why would you leave the church? Now you're lost to us. And I was like, no, I was always a gay non-Mormon.

Yeah. This is not helping you. And they say, but I want more of you. And you say, no. no, you really don't. You want something false I was creating for you, and it's actually not me. You know, my friends who, why would you leave the church? Now you're lost to us. And I was like, no, I was always a gay non-Mormon.

You know, I was just feeding you the story that I was a straight Mormon girl, you know, and I can't feed you that anymore. It's making you sick. It's making me sick. It's not true. And some of them I never saw it again. And some of them came around years later and said, oh, I figured it out. And some probably still are really happy and think I'm going to hell.

You know, I was just feeding you the story that I was a straight Mormon girl, you know, and I can't feed you that anymore. It's making you sick. It's making me sick. It's not true. And some of them I never saw it again. And some of them came around years later and said, oh, I figured it out. And some probably still are really happy and think I'm going to hell.

You know, I was just feeding you the story that I was a straight Mormon girl, you know, and I can't feed you that anymore. It's making you sick. It's making me sick. It's not true. And some of them I never saw it again. And some of them came around years later and said, oh, I figured it out. And some probably still are really happy and think I'm going to hell.

It's an innocent mistake.

It's an innocent mistake.

It's an innocent mistake.

Does that resonate? Oh, totally. Yeah. Here's the thing. You don't expect your dog to pretend it's not a dog. You don't expect your dog... to stop loving walks and chasing a ball and just being a dog. And when it's tired, it'll go to sleep. But often when we fall in love, we try to make ourselves not who we are and try to become the person that will make the other maximally thrilled with us.

Does that resonate? Oh, totally. Yeah. Here's the thing. You don't expect your dog to pretend it's not a dog. You don't expect your dog... to stop loving walks and chasing a ball and just being a dog. And when it's tired, it'll go to sleep. But often when we fall in love, we try to make ourselves not who we are and try to become the person that will make the other maximally thrilled with us.

Does that resonate? Oh, totally. Yeah. Here's the thing. You don't expect your dog to pretend it's not a dog. You don't expect your dog... to stop loving walks and chasing a ball and just being a dog. And when it's tired, it'll go to sleep. But often when we fall in love, we try to make ourselves not who we are and try to become the person that will make the other maximally thrilled with us.