Dr. Mary-Frances O'Connor

Hmm. I think that it's a mystery. Why does it work this way? Except that it helps us to be more resilient, right? I think there's a lot of things where around the time of the loss, we're very zoomed in. People feel guilty. I should have done this. Right.

Hmm. I think that it's a mystery. Why does it work this way? Except that it helps us to be more resilient, right? I think there's a lot of things where around the time of the loss, we're very zoomed in. People feel guilty. I should have done this. Right.

They're zoomed in on the role that you played, you know, even though a hundred different people interacted or were zoomed in on how they felt during that last week instead of how they felt their whole life. You're zoomed in on. I didn't say goodbye. Right. Think of all the times you said goodbye and I love you. And so, I mean, I think it makes sense, right?

They're zoomed in on the role that you played, you know, even though a hundred different people interacted or were zoomed in on how they felt during that last week instead of how they felt their whole life. You're zoomed in on. I didn't say goodbye. Right. Think of all the times you said goodbye and I love you. And so, I mean, I think it makes sense, right?

They're zoomed in on the role that you played, you know, even though a hundred different people interacted or were zoomed in on how they felt during that last week instead of how they felt their whole life. You're zoomed in on. I didn't say goodbye. Right. Think of all the times you said goodbye and I love you. And so, I mean, I think it makes sense, right?

Our brain is trying to understand this very important thing that is happening. Of course, you are zoomed in on it happening. But over time, as we adjust, we realize we sort of are able to zoom out more and we're able to see this in context of so many things.

Our brain is trying to understand this very important thing that is happening. Of course, you are zoomed in on it happening. But over time, as we adjust, we realize we sort of are able to zoom out more and we're able to see this in context of so many things.

Our brain is trying to understand this very important thing that is happening. Of course, you are zoomed in on it happening. But over time, as we adjust, we realize we sort of are able to zoom out more and we're able to see this in context of so many things.

You know, I'm reminded that, you know, as we sleep, one of the functions of those dreams seems to be that we'll go through events again and again. But it's as though the brain is finding a way to detach some of the intensity of the emotion from the memory.

You know, I'm reminded that, you know, as we sleep, one of the functions of those dreams seems to be that we'll go through events again and again. But it's as though the brain is finding a way to detach some of the intensity of the emotion from the memory.

You know, I'm reminded that, you know, as we sleep, one of the functions of those dreams seems to be that we'll go through events again and again. But it's as though the brain is finding a way to detach some of the intensity of the emotion from the memory.

And so maybe this is a similar process over many, many nights and many days, right, where we're able to gain a little more perspective over time and over experience.

And so maybe this is a similar process over many, many nights and many days, right, where we're able to gain a little more perspective over time and over experience.

And so maybe this is a similar process over many, many nights and many days, right, where we're able to gain a little more perspective over time and over experience.

If, for example, you won't allow yourself to think about those lost moments, the moment that he was struggling to breathe or when you saw the car accident or whatever it is, if you won't allow yourself to think about it, that has different implications for memory. And then often it does get more emotional so that the process of avoidance is actually sort of calling it up and then suppressing it.

If, for example, you won't allow yourself to think about those lost moments, the moment that he was struggling to breathe or when you saw the car accident or whatever it is, if you won't allow yourself to think about it, that has different implications for memory. And then often it does get more emotional so that the process of avoidance is actually sort of calling it up and then suppressing it.

If, for example, you won't allow yourself to think about those lost moments, the moment that he was struggling to breathe or when you saw the car accident or whatever it is, if you won't allow yourself to think about it, that has different implications for memory. And then often it does get more emotional so that the process of avoidance is actually sort of calling it up and then suppressing it.

So you're actually calling it up more often than you would if you would just let it come, right? So, I mean, I don't want to make light of it. In some of those cases, it can be very helpful if people are having troubling memories, and especially if the troubling memories are getting worse over time.

So you're actually calling it up more often than you would if you would just let it come, right? So, I mean, I don't want to make light of it. In some of those cases, it can be very helpful if people are having troubling memories, and especially if the troubling memories are getting worse over time.

So you're actually calling it up more often than you would if you would just let it come, right? So, I mean, I don't want to make light of it. In some of those cases, it can be very helpful if people are having troubling memories, and especially if the troubling memories are getting worse over time.